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198 - Proven Mindset to Transforming Fitness From Within With Jared Hamilton
Manage episode 408090714 series 3263896
Challenge conventional wisdom on fat loss with a fresh perspective that prioritizes mental and emotional health as the foundation for physical change. This episode Amy discusses with Jared the critical role of addressing underlying issues like binge eating, emotional eating, and self-sabotage before embarking on a weight loss journey. Learn about the holistic approach to fat loss that encompasses metabolic health, habit formation, and the deep work of aligning your inner world with your outer goals.
Key Takeaways:
- Learn the power of identity work in overcoming health challenges and achieving goals.
- Insights into tackling emotional eating, self-sabotage, and building resilience.
- Key habits and thought patterns for long-term health and wellness.
“Most people are putting the cart before the horse so to speak. So that's the biggest piece is we have to make sure foundationally you're in a good place. It's why my entire IP is all dieting from the inside out.” - Jared Hamilton
Jared's Links:
Jared’s Book Recommendations:
- The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles
- As a man Thinketh: The Original 1902 Edition (The Wisdom Of James Allen)
Follow me on Social Media:
- Amy on IG
- Amy on Facebook
- Lean Bodies Consulting on Facebook
- Check out the Amy Ledin Website
- Lean Bodies Consulting Website for coaching
- Look Like You Train
- Join Our Facebook Group For Females
Resources:
- Build Your Health Character with me
- 5 for 50 Challenge
- How to Build Your First Fat-Loss Diet
- Amy’s Follow-Through Challenge
- 5 Common Mistakes Women Over 40 Make That Lead to Belly Fat
- Meals over Macros & Structured Flexibility
Transcript:
Jared Hamilton 0:00
I started to feel really heavy about what I did for a living. I started to feel like do I want to coach? Like questioning this stuff. Because at the time, like I'd already built my business, I'd started to scale I'd hired employees like we're growing. And now I'm like, the thing I thought I wanted isn't what I want anymore. And so one of the things an early mentor of mine taught me is when you have lack of clarity, you need to go get quiet and be by yourself for a while, and be undistracted. So now it's a running thing I do. I have quarterly what I call Jared sabbaticals. To this day, I still do these where about once a quarter a couple times a year, I literally go get an Airbnb somewhere by myself for several days, just so I can give my brain time to breathe and process all the things.
Amy Ledin 0:40
What are you doing to create your dream life or your best self? Why do we see some thrive through challenges while others struggle? Welcome to F* It!, a podcast where I talk about the main Fs in my life that have helped me in creating my best self: faith, family, forgiveness, food, fitness, and formula. Hi, my name is Amy Ledin and most would say that I've had my fair share of struggles, whether it was placing my baby for adoption at 18, facing my marriage-ending affair, or battling stage four cancer for almost seven years, it's safe to say that I've been through a lot. Join me as I take you through my story, my journeys, and share with you the tactical strategies every single week that will help you thrive and overcome anything you face. That's right, I'm going to show you how to create a future self that you'll be proud of. So buckle up, get ready for the ride as I take you through my story and bring other guests on that have helped me along the way.
Amy Ledin 1:32
So this episode today has been a long time coming to be honest, because I have known of this person for a long, long time, we have been in the same circles, he was in Arete Syndicate with us and I've always loved his content. And recently, we were at an event together in person and so we actually did this episode together via video, both on the same couch. And it was so much fun, emotional, and you know, enlightening. So I am so excited today to have Jared Hamilton on the podcast. You may know him from his podcast, which is called Dieting From The Inside Out, which as I'm sure you were all of you are regular listeners to the podcast, you know that you are nodding your head going yep, this is exactly what Amy talks about all the time. And just the power of mindset, the power of, you know, everything starts from within. So I'm so excited to have Jared on he has been in the industry for a long time. And you know, he's one of the quote-unquote, good guys, one of those people that really gets it and knows that things all start from the inside. So I'm so excited for you to listen to this one. And you will see in the show notes, links to everything about Jared, if you want to go follow him, you definitely will love his content and will really, really resonate with it. So here you go.
Amy Ledin 3:01
I'm so excited to have you on because my podcast, I don't have a lot of men that come on. And I don't have a lot of men that talk about sabotage or fat loss. And I feel like you're like, definitely that's your jam. And that's your area of expertise. But I want to dive in with you, Jared, about just your past because I think that boys don't maybe communicate it. Men don't communicate struggles and I think a lot of people in general just assume that men don't care as much and they don't you know, so like, it's more a vanity thing for females. Right? So I listened to your story and I'm like, we have a lot in common. Take me through like, how did you get to here, the short and condensed version. Talk about your childhood first, take me through that.
Jared Hamilton 3:48
So, fair warning, it's ever since I started going to therapy and working through stuff, now it takes nothing to make me emotional. But basically, so I grew up so I'll be 32 on Saturday. Saturday. Yeah, this week.
Amy Ledin 4:03
Oh wow. This Saturday? Oh, happy birthday. My daughter turns 21 on Monday.
Jared Hamilton 4:09
Okay. Yeah. So here's like, a couple of days. So I'm 32. Basically, growing up I was so, grew up in Indiana, but I grew up basically a complete, most people I tell them this and people go, I would never have guessed or they're like, it makes so much sense. I grew up as a homeschool kid. So I had never seen the inside of a public school other than like, if we went to like a basketball game or something. But I grew up as a homeschool kid in a small town and I'll put it this way. Trying to think about how to word this. We'll just say it wasn't necessarily the best because I, my mom listens to this, I don't want it to be offensive by any means, but it wasn't the greatest. My parents did it because they wanted the best like they wanted the best for us. They didn't want you know, like kids going to public school system and bad shit happens like they were just, they didn't want that to happen. Grew up in a more religious household, all the things and so that's how I started out growing up as a kid. So I had my struggles, education was always a hard thing for me I struggled with like learning anything at all. Like, I almost wonder to this day if I would be diagnosed with a learning disorder, something like that. So went through, went through all that. But then now it's time for college. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I was scared shitless because again, I've never done anything public. Like I've been homeschooled my whole life.
Amy Ledin 5:32
It's crazy for me to think of now because you are so natural.
Jared Hamilton 5:37
It wasn't always natural, Amy. But no. Well, so what happened was, well, I left, one thing I forgot, I left out is, but the thing I think that truly saved the social communication side of things was when I was about 14, I got involved in martial arts, because again, I didn't play sports. I was the awkward homeschool kid that couldn't talk normal.
Amy Ledin 5:55
And back then homeschool was like, you know, for the weirdos I'm just (inaudible).
Jared Hamilton 5:59
You're not wrong.
Amy Ledin 5:59
That's what people labeled it right?
Jared Hamilton 6:01
Yeah. Now it's like public schools have homeschool options now. Like, they call it remote now, but anyway, so but what I think helped me so much was the I got when I was like 14 involved in martial arts. Well, because then that's the only extracurricular I had. I literally just was at the school every day, I decided to take every art they offered. All of it. And then I would just do as much as I could like finish school and go to the school and train and do classes. Well then one thing led to another I was there for years ended up getting like black belts and all that stuff. But then my got my first coaching job. The guy that owned the place says, hey, we needed an assistant instructor to help teach warm-ups and private lessons and stuff. Are you interested? I go, sure. I'm here every day anyway, I might as well get paid for it. So started doing that. But then when I'm like a teenager, I'm doing private lessons with six-year-olds, 60-year-olds, teaching classes, all the things. So that was beginning stages of me coaching, those beginning stages me learning how to communicate and like as you talk to a six-year-old differently than a 60 year old and all the different things. And then that's where I found my fascination with physiology and like biomechanics and all that stuff. So that's when I went to college. And I'm like, well, I guess I'm gonna be a physical therapist had no idea I wanted to be, like, go that route. Actually, I didn't want to necessarily, I'm just my thought was, what can I do that makes okay money that I tolerate the most, which is not the way to approach being successful and happy. So that's what that's the route that I went. But I struggled like a motherfucker like I like it took me I was wondering like a normal college. It was like a community college, took me four years to get an associate's degree, dropped the class every single semester for the entire four years because I could not handle it mentally. I couldn't handle the load. The learning just wasn't happening. I didn't even really know algebra going into that. I lived in the tutoring center. Anything math related was just like not, you know, I count calories, as a joke, I count calories for a living. But it was a struggle like it was hard, like college was probably the worst. Those were some of the worst four years ever because it was so stressful, because I was just not prepared. It was so overwhelming, all the things. But I got through it, did all that all the stuff. That's why I found out about this cool thing called personal training. And one of the classes I took for my degree was like a CPT prep class essentially. Fell in love with it, I would, they had us doing like training each other at gyms and shit. And it was so much fun. But I've always been entrepreneurial. Like when I was 13, I was going door to door offering to shovel snow and driveways for like 20 bucks. So I've had this entrepreneurial bone, because I also grew up playing drums. And then I started teaching drum lessons. So I've always had like always wanting to do little side hustles and things like that. Yeah. So did that. But then I fell in love with this personal trainer thing. I'm like, oh, this is dope, I get my biomechanic fix, I get to see people before they go to the physical therapist, and this is actually fun. So that's dope, then I go. But then I thought well, I can say getting a normal job. Because at the time I was working for like Papa John's or like a GNC or just normal jobs. I'm like, well, this way I can at least schedule clients between classes, and then make better money. So that's cool. That was my logic. One thing led to another I was working for three different gyms, one of them was independent, and I built an entire personal training company. So but by the time I got there, then I quit all the corporate jobs. And then I was just pursuing my personal training business completely full-time. I was doing like 200 sessions a month soloing it 438 and 9P every day, just grinding my face off, which was great. I learned more than ever, because like I had every client, you couldn't, it was to the point where like, you could give me a client with every single issue you could think of and I'm like, cool. I've had seven of them or whatever.
Amy Ledin 9:37
Because you have so much experience at that point.
Jared Hamilton 9:39
Yeah and I did that for years. And then one thing led to another I decided I didn't want to do personal training thing anymore because 438 or 9P was a grind. That's when I found this online thing. So I started creating content on Instagram.
Amy Ledin 9:52
This is his gift by the way, please go follow him.
Jared Hamilton 9:56
I started creating content on Instagram, had no idea what I was doing, I was like, side by side videos of like a squat, like don't do it this way, do it this way that kind of stuff, hired my first mentor out the gate to teach me how to transition my in-person business online. So one of the best things I ever did the biggest shortcut I ever took was, before I did anything stupid, I hired a mentor to show me how to do it.
Amy Ledin 10:15
Very smart. And I will say to add, we met you at Arete so I already knew meeting you that I'm like, okay, this guy is interested in personal development, because anyone that is investing in themselves at that level is like, I'm serious about change. I'm serious about growth. And immediately I already am like, hey, these are my people.
Jared Hamilton 10:32
Right. Right. Right. So there's that and then from there, it's just been growing the online coaching business and then from since then, I've scaled my company and hired a bunch of people and (inaudible).
Amy Ledin 10:44
You've exploded, you're huge on TikTok, I will say like, TikTok, definitely, that's where I even see you all the time in my explorer, because I don't even purposely follow people. I like to just go to like the one where you just scroll and see what comes out. And then it's like, I like to see who comes up with my algorithm and you come up for me, so.
Jared Hamilton 11:00
The joke is, on TikTok, if you follow him, you'll never see him again.
Amy Ledin 11:03
Exactly. That's why I don't, I think I follow two people on there. It's like recipes. And I never see their stuff now.
Jared Hamilton 11:09
You follow me it never shows you again.
Amy Ledin 11:11
So I definitely think, you and sabotage those two words go together in terms of like your coaching. Where did this, was it a personal struggle for you that made you get so interested in it or was it a like you started to see clients struggle with it? What made you dive so far into this because you are all about the inner work and all about coming from the inside out.
Jared Hamilton 11:34
So for me with this kind of stuff, so I struggled with my own stuff. Growing up, I was a fat kid. I always struggled with all the things that I teach I struggled with. So like all my friends were shredded and had six packs and I was like chunky, Jared, like we talked about on my podcast, like your nickname growing up was Piglet mine is Eeyore.
Amy Ledin 11:51
Oh my gosh.
Jared Hamilton 11:52
Because I was a chunky sad kid is what it was so. So that was one of my nicknames growing up. So because I've also always been a very more emotional person as a whole. So like, like right now like, oh, yeah, beard and tattoos and shit in this like, no, I will try like that. So and then well and that's why it's weird that now like, going full circle, the inner game was like, not my shit. Like, I've always been fascinated by high performers but that was to the extent of it not that long ago, I thought therapy was only for suicidal people and psychopaths. Then where it changed for me was when I started diving into wait, let me take a step back. So I had all that struggles that's why I can resonate with our clients so much. Where I got into the realm of psychology and behavior change and all that stuff, in the deeper levels of stuff is I saw it with our clients first. So what happened was, before that, I really dove into personal development. That's when I like joined things like Arete, and have a mini library at home, all the books, all the things.
Amy Ledin 12:52
And you've invested, like, let's just keep this in mind. If you're listening to him, and you're like, oh, because you're gonna go follow him and you're gonna see how successful he is. You've also invested a lot into yourself.
Jared Hamilton 13:00
Yeah, I'm like, on paper, like, I mean, I added it up like, someone asked me the other day, and I mean, I've invested over six figures in like, personal development coaching over the years and things like that. Well, so I started studying people like psychologists and neuroscientists like Dispenza and Kyle Cease and Dr. Lapera, and all the things in so that opened up a lot for me. So then things really changes when I went to therapy because I thought I was great. Everything is like upstairs, things were fantastic. But I noticed I saw like, well, I'm doing this thing where I want to become astronomically successful. I have crazy goals, all the things, but then I thought to myself, well, I should probably check to make sure I'm handling my stress well, I said because like we see with clients, they think they're losing weight the right way, but starving for three days in the keto diet is not the best thing, but it's all they know. So I thought to myself, I go you know, I want to just do a mental checkup. I feel fine, but I don't want to wait till the sky is falling in case there is something there. At the time my wife was already in therapy had been in therapy for a while, which means the therapist knows all about me because that's how it works. So I said I'll just have a session with her, her name is Pamela, I said I'm also going to have a session with Pamela just to check in on things upstairs. First session, I bawled my fucking eyes out. I'm telling you, she said tell me about your childhood and I started like telling her the exact same story that I've told a million times and I felt this thing coming and coming and I'm like fuck damn it. I didn't think this was gonna happen. And I talked about some of the stuff I struggled with as a kid and then she's like well what were your names and labels and we talked about the way the intricacies of the Eeyore thing or we talked about this and then all of a sudden there is some fucking there so and then I've done therapy since.
Amy Ledin 14:46
Wow, so you live it I mean you really do came from a personal like you've seen these things that you teach successful in yourself, right?
Jared Hamilton 14:56
Yeah. So after I had that blow up and go like my headspace entirely changed, my view of therapy changed. Because as soon as I started therapy, I wanted to also like, it's still a stigma that men are weak little bitches for it. So then I started talking publicly about it. Like, you know, I had a therapy session for the first time and bawled my eyes out, and I would talk about it. What's funny is the amount of men that have come in my DMs and like, hey.
Jared Hamilton 14:56
I bet that's why I think that this episode, because I don't think men talk about it enough and they are hurting just as much.
Jared Hamilton 15:11
Yeah, 100%, 100%. Like, let's put it this way, the majority of my following like, Instagram analytics is like 75-80% women, 95% of our clientele are women. But I have never had more men reach out because of this, so. So then I just went full bore therapy, consistently, inner work, all the things. But then where it got tied to coaching is where things really shifted because after because, you know, then self-awareness grows and like emotional regulation changes. And then what happened was, I started feeling really heavy about what I did for a living, I started to feel like, do I want to coach like, like questioning this stuff? Because at the time, like, I'd already built my business, I had started to scale, I hired employees, like we're growing. And now I'm like, the thing I thought I wanted isn't what I wanted anymore. And so one of the things an early mentor of mine taught me is when you have lack of clarity, you need to go get quiet and be by yourself for a while, and be undistracted. So now it's a running thing I do I have quarterly what I call Jared sabbaticals. To this day, I still do these where, about once a quarter a couple times a year, I literally go get an Airbnb somewhere by myself for several days and just so I can get my brain time to breathe and process and all the things. So the one I went on, though, so in Indiana, it's not hard to find a farm in the middle of nowhere. I got an Airbnb on a farm in the middle of nowhere with a little miniature horse. And so I went and had like three or four days by myself. And I'm like, I'm talking about like, barely cellphone reception. I like sitting by a fire for three hours. Like that kind of stuff. Can't hear the road, can't hear cars, just by myself because I was at the standstill. I'm like, fuck, why don't I want this anymore? Why is this feeling heavy, because at the time, I was just teaching what I would call sustainable fat loss. It was just like, how you can lose weight, working on a couple times a week, eating a doughnut and still losing weight, right, that kind of stuff. But then I noticed a pattern. This is the clarity that I started to get. I noticed a pattern that I didn't market it but we had to do a lot of groundwork with our clients with this deeper stuff before we could send them to fat loss. So let's say Mrs. Jones would come in, she's like, I'm ready to lose weight. We started losing weight and I'm like oh fuck, she binge eats. Okay, I gotta stop the binge eating, then she can get her gonna lose weight, would do it, send her on her way. She's great. Then the next client would come in and they'd be doing great. We go right into fat loss stuff and like, oh, they're sabotaging because their identity is fucked. Okay, I gotta fix this identity, got to change a steak. I do all this stuff, then do all that and then send them on its way and then he's successful. But then I'm like, oh, this is everybody. And I wasn't but I wasn't (inaudible) I wasn't talking about it. I was just doing it like in like coaching because I like oh, I can't do the thing I know I need to do, it's like move into a house and then you find out the foundation's fuck, it's like, okay, I gotta fix this, then I can finally do the other stuff.
Jared Hamilton 15:47
Totally. You are the analogy case, like the foundation one, I'm always like, that is so good.
Jared Hamilton 18:13
So that's how I viewed it from my logical brain. So then I got to thinking to myself, man, I need, I wish-wish there was a world where you did both these things. Like I wish I could build a program that I did both of this stuff like the inner world stuff, the inner game and the outer game stuff. And I go but no one's done it. No one's done it. So I'm like, no competition is dope. What actually to be honest, gives me a lot of hope as we were talking off camera about Kyle Cease, he's got he's a friend now. As a mentor, he's changed a lot for me. Well, Kyle gave me unconscious permission for this because Kyle do the same thing in comedy. He built the most amazing stand up comedy career, and then found out it's not what he wanted. He wanted to get in transformation. He's like, I should just feel like I could do both of these. Wait. And now he does like, both, like transformational communications (inaudible).
Amy Ledin 19:03
Gave himself permission.
Jared Hamilton 19:04
Yeah. And I go, Oh, maybe I could build this. So then I flipped on my entrepreneurial brain and then I redid everything. Now, mind you, as soon as I go okay, this is what I want to do. This is where I feel aligned with emotionally, vibrationally all the things. All the sabotage, all of the imposter syndrome came in. It's like, who do you think you are? You're not a psychologist, you stay in your own fucking lane then other people saying the same thing. And I was like, but I just I feel like I'm supposed to be here with this very specific lane. So I said fuck it and I ran through it, redid all my contents about this stuff. I rebranded the podcast to Dieting From The Inside Out. I redid our entire coaching program and I marketed it like, yo, this is how we process things we're going to do like we're going to diet you from the inside out. First, fix all these things. Then we're going to go into like actual like the fat loss and the transformation and all the stuff. And so I went full bore with all of it and haven't looked back since.
Amy Ledin 20:00
I love it. And I think I want to dive in a couple things there. I think what I love about that, too is you already know that in the person that's coming to you, the fact that they're willing to pause the fat loss for a season just tells you they already have the right mindset, even if it's been forced upon them, because you're like, hey, I'm not letting you diet yet. Because, you know, they want their plan. They're like, chomping at the bit, because they think that's the answer when the reality is like, this is the work that everyone needs to be doing. So talk me through, give me one tactical thing because obviously, people should come take your course and do it. But what's one tactical thing you make every new client do?
Jared Hamilton 20:36
So in the world of the inner game, there's a lot, right? Like, it's like, I use the and think of the inner game as like the term vehicle. Well, there's a lot of categories underneath vehicles, cars, trucks, motorcycles, SUVs, all the things, the inner game is no different. One of the first things we do is identity work, usually one of the first because everything sabotages to your identity, your identity is what governs your unconscious actions, which is 90% of most people. And then everything else sabotages to it. Like we can talk about sabotaging mechanisms, like when you're emotionally triggered, or whatever the case is, but most people just align themselves and their actions with who they think they are. So one of the first things we do is we do identity work. And from a tactical standpoint, when people like okay, well, fuck I've never, I don't I've never even heard identity, until just now so what do I do to, what do I do to fix it? So one of the first things that we do is there's a thing I call the coma letter, it's a concept that I came up with, where, because most people when they need to do the identity work, they've never even heard of anything remotely close, and they're not personal development junkies like you and I are so. So I play out a scenario, I go, okay, I want you to picture this. I said, you're going into brain surgery, something happened, you're going into brain surgery, and the surgeon comes in and says, all right, look Amy, I gotta go do some cool shit upstairs. But there's like a 50/50 shot that I might hit the reset switch. There's like a I have to take this, you know, this tumor out, whatever. But you there's on paper a 50/50 chance, I will hit the reset switch and you will have no recollection of who you are. When you wake up you won't know who mom is, you won't know who dad is, you will you'll be a complete blank slate. So write yourself a letter telling yourself who you actually are. So I'll give you half hour, he disappears. That's a fucking big reality check. But my question is, what would you write because I can guarantee you you're not going to write how much of a binger you are, you're not gonna write how, how lack of confidence you are, you're not going to talk about how you've always been a dieter and you struggled your whole life, you're probably going to write the most superhero story you've ever written. If it was me, I would lie through my fucking teeth.
Amy Ledin 22:37
Yeah, I'm so great at this. This is what I'm doing.
Jared Hamilton 22:39
I would be like, I'm a billionaire. I just went through a tax bankruptcy. So but I have all my assets still, like I would literally write like, the most superhero-like scenario ever. But that's who you are. That's like this reality that you are right now is just just, it's a past, it's an artifact. So that's who you actually are. But then the identity work is aligning your actions and values with that until you have a stack of irrefutable proof you are who you say you are.
Amy Ledin 23:07
I love that. So how because you know, you are someone yesterday and your stories, it was about staying ready. And you obviously have done a lot of identity work on yourself. Teach a little bit about the stay ready. Like why that's so important. Because, I mean, you're a connector. I know you know so many people and I really believe that a lot of people rise to the top because of that they're truly trying to like, add value and but like you said, you came from the homeschool child that was like, couldn't talk. No one would know that. I mean, like, I'm shocked listening to that because you're such a talker, you are like always on like, I know, if I go to your stories, I'm gonna see you in the video there's not like still shots, you're like talking. What did you do to become this person? What is some of the identity shifts? Like do you write? Did you write a letter to yourself? Do you look at that often?
Jared Hamilton 23:59
Yeah, I mean, I've done a lot like all the inner game stuff, but like I teach, to be honest, I haven't looked at it in a minute. To be honest, it would probably be good to I think everyone needs different phases of these letters. Because I think a lot of times too many people, I think it depends on what it is. I think there are some things that I need to go back and have reflective time. But I think it's like, no, we need the next version of that. You know what I mean? Where it's like what's, if we think of like Netflix, like, what's the next season? Like you're looking to the next thing? Well, what's the next version of you? What's the next version of you? You know, like, when I thought I was 23 I thought I was hot shit. Like, I thought I was like, I was getting into business. It's like when I first started making a little bit of money. I was like, fuck, let's roll like I'm killing it. But then now if I had that reality of like a panic attack, or I'm like, I sound like I'll see the Facebook time hops of like content I made three years ago and it's terrible. Like, it's terrible.
Amy Ledin 24:50
Like, what did I do? (inaudible)
Jared Hamilton 24:51
Well, it's no different in leveling up yourself. So I'm gonna see I think right now I'm like, the best things have been, from a communication standpoint, from a these different levels of me, I know, I'm gonna look back in three years, I'm like, what at a fucking (inaudible), you know what I'm saying? So I think it's important to go back and do these, these exercises of like your identity, reinventing yourself, what? Excuse me? What are your values and things like that? I think it's important to do that frequently, or at least on an ongoing basis. So I think that's a big piece of it.
Amy Ledin 25:20
So when you say stay ready, what does that look like for you? Because, you know, you're someone that I mean, I would say in our because we're in a business coaching, you know, group together, you're definitely one of the top dogs. And you are constantly I mean, you put out so much content, you are always doing things. How do you find like, the chutzpah or whatever people say, right inside you to do this? Because obviously, it's not like people go, oh, I'm just gifted with it. It's not, but I want you to
Jared Hamilton 25:49
Yeah, so there's two sides with like, how do I have the oomph to keep doing it? It's, I'm not where I want to be. At the end of the day, I'm not where I want to be I know,
Amy Ledin 25:58
And you have clarity on (inaudible)
Jared Hamilton 25:58
I have clarity on that. But then I also have more clarity on what I have, what's gonna happen if I don't get it. One thing we teach our clients is like, we need our help list. Like, what if you don't do this, what's gonna happen? What's on paper get, it's like, when my favorite analogies to use for it is going into Christmas time. It's like the story of Scrooge, he didn't change his actions until like, I think it was Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come and says, look, motherfucker, this is what's going to happen if you don't change. So I think about that.
Amy Ledin 26:23
I like that, you know, that's so important to what's going to happen if I don't do this.
Jared Hamilton 26:27
Truthfully, because I think when people are struggling or they are in their low season of their life, I think like the happy positive, what's your why, isn't strong enough.
Amy Ledin 26:35
No, it isn't. And that's, I mean, even Tony Robbins talks about that, like you make decisions based on pain or pleasure. And so it's why sometimes the pain is going to pull me faster than the pleasure because let's face it, I want a six-pack. But I mean, not that much. You know what I mean? Like, we can sit in that pleasure, but the pain is of going in my closet and nothing fitting for my next you know, I mean, that would propel me more.
Jared Hamilton 26:57
Totally, totally. So I think for me, it's like, it's just a discipline thing. It's part of just who I am, it's from an identity standpoint is I am consistent, I do the same things I said I'm going to do, also my expectations are on point is I know, I'm going to have to make more content than what I think that I need to make, I'm going to not want to show up all the things. So it's like with a weight loss client, they're going to not be motivated. They're going it's going to take longer than what they want. So I have that expectation. So I just it's part of what I do. But then the stay ready stuff is I know this was talking about my story yesterday that I just know these unicorn moments and these opportunities. They're called unicorn moments because they don't come around that often. But if you jump on them, you are literally shortcutting all these different areas in your life and I've been fortunate enough in the past. I had like three yesterday to be honest, I like I talked about three mini ones yesterday, but then like over the last year, I've had so many opportunities jump at me because A, I'm in alignment with them and then I, part of me believes I deserve them because of the effort I put in because I do the things most people won't do. So I feel like I deserve things that most people don't don't get. But then the other side is I don't know when they're going to come around. So I'm going to do my due diligence of working hard, being consistent, doing all the things knowing what I want in than just waiting for them. Not waiting, like sitting here twiddling my thumbs but I
Jared Hamilton 26:57
Right, you're still doing action while you're knowing (inaudible).
Jared Hamilton 27:14
Right. It's like a weight loss client like, no the weight's gonna drop. No, the clothes are gonna fit but it's up to them to be consistent. We just don't know when that day is gonna come. Right? So that's how I view it. But a mentor of mine early on said made that statement he said just stay ready. So you don't have to get ready because getting ready. It's often too late. So that so it's almost like in a weird way every day. I'm like, all right, is today the day? Okay, no, that's fine.
Amy Ledin 28:43
I love that. And you know, on on my podcast, we talk a lot about you got to put it out there because if you're not open to it, it's like you saying you got to have clarity. It mean if you're just saying you want to get in shape, it's just not clear enough for your brain, right? It's the same with like coming to this I went into it going okay, what am I expecting out of this? Okay, I'm going to meet two people that are going to change my business. I'm going to walk away with three things like really specific so that my brain looks for it. It's like hey, where are the two people I'm waiting? Where are they here at this event? So I think you do a lot of that I kind of take notes because you seem to be the connector.
Jared Hamilton 29:20
Well, and the thing is to I think the other piece is I just know you're one conversation, one moment, one piece of content away from your life, never been the same like this, like last week, I had because of one video that I made or one podcast episode I made. I think like maybe eight months ago, someone reshared it in someone else's Facebook group. That person has happened to be the operations manager for one of the biggest calorie tracking apps and she wants me to write a course for them and send their two to three million monthly subscribers to me.
Amy Ledin 29:52
That's insane.
Jared Hamilton 29:53
Right? So like, which is dope but what if I didn't make that piece of content? What if the way I wasn't present on that piece of content about I think it was on binge eating didn't resonate well, it wouldn't have gotten shared on the exact time she saw it. So then when I saw the email come through, I scheduled a call with her ASAP. Or that's just one example or whatever it may be like.
Amy Ledin 30:15
And you believe that you, I think people don't believe in nothing themselves, like I am worthy of good things happening to me. And I am expecting like when you said earlier, like I expect it. And that is a huge, you know, opening yourself up to all of these opportunities.
Jared Hamilton 30:30
Well, and then I also realized, I'm not going to get the 10 out of 10 on the first shot, like for example, let's say one of my big goals is I want to close a stadium out. One of my big speaking goals is I want to close out a stadium like
Amy Ledin 30:43
That's what I was gonna say, what's your big, crazy, hairy goal?
Jared Hamilton 30:45
Kevin Hart level stadium close out, I saw one of Kevin Hart's, one of his specials, like on Hulu or Netflix or whatever, he literally closed down a 360 stadium. And it was like every seat was full. I want to do that I want to close the stadium out. But I know I'm not just gonna have an opportunity to close it close the stadium out from right where I'm at now, but there but like one of the things that happened yesterday, I got invited to the event that we're out, I got invited to speak on a business panel on it on Friday. So I said, absolutely. I have no idea what to talk about. I have no idea what the thing is about. But is it in the direction of the thing that I want? 1000% Because right now, I'm telling you, I'm probably not ready to close out a stadium yet. I would look like a babbling idiot. But I bet like in front of 500 people, I will probably be okay.
Jared Hamilton 31:06
Right. It was until you did coaching con, right? Last year. So that was probably like, you're just slowly building your (inaudible) gonna be at the stadium.
Jared Hamilton 31:42
Yeah. Well, and that's the thing is, I think, to me, people like, yeah, you want to be clear on what you want. But also like, it's going to take several dots being connected.
Amy Ledin 31:50
It's like with fat loss, okay, I want to lose 90 pounds. Well, you're not going to be there for a while. But you got to lose the five to lose the 10 to lose the 15. So I got to speak to five people before I speak to 10. Before then I'm in front of an audience, you know, so wow, I like that. What is, in your business and now with all the people that you've worked with, what do you think is the biggest mistake that females make, like in you know, assuming what they need done versus what you think is the number one thing that they need help with?
Jared Hamilton 32:21
I think most people aren't ready for weight loss yet. I think there's way too many foundational pieces that aren't there. I think so many people, because of expectations, because of diet culture, because of impatience, I think people are just too willing to jump right into fat loss. But it's kind of like that house thing. You just bought a house and you're ready to make room additions. But every day the wall's cracking because the foundation's fucked, that has to be fixed first. I think most people, it's why the way that we coach people, it's why stage one for us, we call it Dieting From The Inside Out is because most people need some metabolic work. They've been eating 900 in total calories a day, like that's not a foundation to lose fat from. So we, from the inner side and the outer side, we need to make sure metabolically you're in a good place. And from a habitual side, you're in a good place. Because like at the end of the day, like if you can't be consistent for more than 14 days, like it doesn't matter what you do for those 14 days. But then the inner game piece as well, because one of the questions we ask almost everyone, when especially if someone's not bought in on the dining from the inside out stuff, they're like, Okay, I get it, but like, why can't I go into fat loss yet? My favorite question that solves it every time it's like, oh, cool. If I could snap my fingers and the 50 pounds disappears, is it staying off? It's a yes or no question. And most people go, ah, probably not. I go okay, well, why? They go well, I'd still be binge eating on the weekends. But I'd still be emotionally eating in the pantry every bad day. Well, then I know I'd subconsciously sabotage it because every time I lose 10 pounds, and I jump on the scale, I binge eat and I fall off and whatever. My relationship with food will still be horrible. My metabolism would still be fucked. I'd have no idea how to keep the weight off and they just go down the list. I go okay, so if you just admitted magic genie powers does not get your problem solved why are we white knuckling through weight loss? It's illogical at this point. So then I rephrase I go well, what if we flip that question? What if I said if I snap my fingers and binge eating is gone, food relationship healed, your inner game is on point, you're metabolically great, your habits are great, you're consistent. You're disciplined. Do you think weight loss would be that big of a deal? And they go I feel like it would just happen. I go it would exactly just happen.
Amy Ledin 34:21
Yeah it'd be background for you, essentially, right?
Jared Hamilton 34:24
It's most people are putting the cart before the horse so to speak. So that's that's the biggest piece is we have to make sure foundationally you're in a good place. It's why like my entire IP is all dieting from the inside out.
Amy Ledin 34:34
Totally. So one, where can people find you and two, what is in the future for you right now? Like what are you working on?
Jared Hamilton 34:43
Yeah, so I hang out most days on Instagram, TikTok @RealJaredHamilton. My podcast is Dieting From The Inside Out, available everywhere. As far as what I'm excited on right now is one, just keep scaling the business and just keep growing and fine-tuning and helping. Really enjoying getting into speaking like I want to do more at the podcast, doing a lot with it. And just a lot bigger speaking things in the future, I just got invited to speak for an event in 2025, another coaching event in Vegas, which is pretty cool. And then it's getting close to the stadium.
Amy Ledin 35:16
I love when you have stuff like this recorded too, because you're gonna look back on this and be like I because I remember Tom Bilyeu, actually, he had, on one of his podcasts, that he was going to be bigger than Disney. And he says it all the time, right? And I'm like, I love when people are willing to put their scary dreams because here's the thing, someone could be listening right now that listens to you that has some connection with someone they know that they're suddenly going to go, okay, because you put that out there. I have a stadium that I want you to, you know what I mean, I know an event that you could be perfect for. And that is the only, and if people don't share those things, it never comes out. What is a book, two books actually, that you think everyone should read?
Jared Hamilton 35:54
War of Art by Steven Pressfield. It's, I've been talking about it a lot lately. The whole concept is that resistance is required.
Amy Ledin 36:01
Good. I gotta read it. Because that's one on my list.
Jared Hamilton 36:03
It is one of my favorites. It's so good. The whole book is on the resistance. When you, whenever you do anything new and noteworthy or pursuing something greater than yourself, whatever it is, is, the resistance isn't just going to happen but it is required to get where you want to go. There's just no way around it. And then one of my favorite books at all times. I always have a copy in my bag to give to people who when I feel like it really would resonate is As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.
Amy Ledin 36:29
Oh, that's two choices I was surprised. So these are yeah, I thought you would do Joe Dispenza. I wondered (inaudible) I'm sure it's on your list. Now these are two books I've not read. These would be ones I want to
Jared Hamilton 36:40
I'm in the middle of Joe's book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself. Fantastic. Like humor. It's probably one of my top five. But those were the first two that just were my first come out was The War of Art. Not the Art of War. That's a different book. But War of Art by Steven Pressfield. And As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.
Amy Ledin 36:58
Awesome. Okay, well, I have really enjoyed this today (inaudible) I think we need to do another one at some point where we can dive into something else. Thank you for coming on. I appreciate it.
Jared Hamilton 37:08
Of course. Thank you for having me.
Amy Ledin 37:09
Okay, I'm on a mission. As you know, if you've been following along, I have a goal to be at top 100 podcasts. And it's less about that top 100 and more about I want to make an impact. I want more people to hear F* It! and learn from all of the mistakes that I've made, along with me bringing on really special guests for you. So my ask here is this. I want you to screenshot this episode today and share it on your social media, share it with a friend, you know, tag me in it. Go give me a review, of course, if you're really feeling it, and rate me. You know, this is the only way things are gonna get seen here. And in a big world of tons and tons of podcasts, I'm hoping that you're going to choose mine and help me on my mission.
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DISCLAIMER: The opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints expressed by the hosts and guests on this podcast do not necessarily represent or reflect the official policy, opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints of Disenyo.co LLC and its employees.
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Manage episode 408090714 series 3263896
Challenge conventional wisdom on fat loss with a fresh perspective that prioritizes mental and emotional health as the foundation for physical change. This episode Amy discusses with Jared the critical role of addressing underlying issues like binge eating, emotional eating, and self-sabotage before embarking on a weight loss journey. Learn about the holistic approach to fat loss that encompasses metabolic health, habit formation, and the deep work of aligning your inner world with your outer goals.
Key Takeaways:
- Learn the power of identity work in overcoming health challenges and achieving goals.
- Insights into tackling emotional eating, self-sabotage, and building resilience.
- Key habits and thought patterns for long-term health and wellness.
“Most people are putting the cart before the horse so to speak. So that's the biggest piece is we have to make sure foundationally you're in a good place. It's why my entire IP is all dieting from the inside out.” - Jared Hamilton
Jared's Links:
Jared’s Book Recommendations:
- The War of Art: Break Through the Blocks and Win Your Inner Creative Battles
- As a man Thinketh: The Original 1902 Edition (The Wisdom Of James Allen)
Follow me on Social Media:
- Amy on IG
- Amy on Facebook
- Lean Bodies Consulting on Facebook
- Check out the Amy Ledin Website
- Lean Bodies Consulting Website for coaching
- Look Like You Train
- Join Our Facebook Group For Females
Resources:
- Build Your Health Character with me
- 5 for 50 Challenge
- How to Build Your First Fat-Loss Diet
- Amy’s Follow-Through Challenge
- 5 Common Mistakes Women Over 40 Make That Lead to Belly Fat
- Meals over Macros & Structured Flexibility
Transcript:
Jared Hamilton 0:00
I started to feel really heavy about what I did for a living. I started to feel like do I want to coach? Like questioning this stuff. Because at the time, like I'd already built my business, I'd started to scale I'd hired employees like we're growing. And now I'm like, the thing I thought I wanted isn't what I want anymore. And so one of the things an early mentor of mine taught me is when you have lack of clarity, you need to go get quiet and be by yourself for a while, and be undistracted. So now it's a running thing I do. I have quarterly what I call Jared sabbaticals. To this day, I still do these where about once a quarter a couple times a year, I literally go get an Airbnb somewhere by myself for several days, just so I can give my brain time to breathe and process all the things.
Amy Ledin 0:40
What are you doing to create your dream life or your best self? Why do we see some thrive through challenges while others struggle? Welcome to F* It!, a podcast where I talk about the main Fs in my life that have helped me in creating my best self: faith, family, forgiveness, food, fitness, and formula. Hi, my name is Amy Ledin and most would say that I've had my fair share of struggles, whether it was placing my baby for adoption at 18, facing my marriage-ending affair, or battling stage four cancer for almost seven years, it's safe to say that I've been through a lot. Join me as I take you through my story, my journeys, and share with you the tactical strategies every single week that will help you thrive and overcome anything you face. That's right, I'm going to show you how to create a future self that you'll be proud of. So buckle up, get ready for the ride as I take you through my story and bring other guests on that have helped me along the way.
Amy Ledin 1:32
So this episode today has been a long time coming to be honest, because I have known of this person for a long, long time, we have been in the same circles, he was in Arete Syndicate with us and I've always loved his content. And recently, we were at an event together in person and so we actually did this episode together via video, both on the same couch. And it was so much fun, emotional, and you know, enlightening. So I am so excited today to have Jared Hamilton on the podcast. You may know him from his podcast, which is called Dieting From The Inside Out, which as I'm sure you were all of you are regular listeners to the podcast, you know that you are nodding your head going yep, this is exactly what Amy talks about all the time. And just the power of mindset, the power of, you know, everything starts from within. So I'm so excited to have Jared on he has been in the industry for a long time. And you know, he's one of the quote-unquote, good guys, one of those people that really gets it and knows that things all start from the inside. So I'm so excited for you to listen to this one. And you will see in the show notes, links to everything about Jared, if you want to go follow him, you definitely will love his content and will really, really resonate with it. So here you go.
Amy Ledin 3:01
I'm so excited to have you on because my podcast, I don't have a lot of men that come on. And I don't have a lot of men that talk about sabotage or fat loss. And I feel like you're like, definitely that's your jam. And that's your area of expertise. But I want to dive in with you, Jared, about just your past because I think that boys don't maybe communicate it. Men don't communicate struggles and I think a lot of people in general just assume that men don't care as much and they don't you know, so like, it's more a vanity thing for females. Right? So I listened to your story and I'm like, we have a lot in common. Take me through like, how did you get to here, the short and condensed version. Talk about your childhood first, take me through that.
Jared Hamilton 3:48
So, fair warning, it's ever since I started going to therapy and working through stuff, now it takes nothing to make me emotional. But basically, so I grew up so I'll be 32 on Saturday. Saturday. Yeah, this week.
Amy Ledin 4:03
Oh wow. This Saturday? Oh, happy birthday. My daughter turns 21 on Monday.
Jared Hamilton 4:09
Okay. Yeah. So here's like, a couple of days. So I'm 32. Basically, growing up I was so, grew up in Indiana, but I grew up basically a complete, most people I tell them this and people go, I would never have guessed or they're like, it makes so much sense. I grew up as a homeschool kid. So I had never seen the inside of a public school other than like, if we went to like a basketball game or something. But I grew up as a homeschool kid in a small town and I'll put it this way. Trying to think about how to word this. We'll just say it wasn't necessarily the best because I, my mom listens to this, I don't want it to be offensive by any means, but it wasn't the greatest. My parents did it because they wanted the best like they wanted the best for us. They didn't want you know, like kids going to public school system and bad shit happens like they were just, they didn't want that to happen. Grew up in a more religious household, all the things and so that's how I started out growing up as a kid. So I had my struggles, education was always a hard thing for me I struggled with like learning anything at all. Like, I almost wonder to this day if I would be diagnosed with a learning disorder, something like that. So went through, went through all that. But then now it's time for college. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. I was scared shitless because again, I've never done anything public. Like I've been homeschooled my whole life.
Amy Ledin 5:32
It's crazy for me to think of now because you are so natural.
Jared Hamilton 5:37
It wasn't always natural, Amy. But no. Well, so what happened was, well, I left, one thing I forgot, I left out is, but the thing I think that truly saved the social communication side of things was when I was about 14, I got involved in martial arts, because again, I didn't play sports. I was the awkward homeschool kid that couldn't talk normal.
Amy Ledin 5:55
And back then homeschool was like, you know, for the weirdos I'm just (inaudible).
Jared Hamilton 5:59
You're not wrong.
Amy Ledin 5:59
That's what people labeled it right?
Jared Hamilton 6:01
Yeah. Now it's like public schools have homeschool options now. Like, they call it remote now, but anyway, so but what I think helped me so much was the I got when I was like 14 involved in martial arts. Well, because then that's the only extracurricular I had. I literally just was at the school every day, I decided to take every art they offered. All of it. And then I would just do as much as I could like finish school and go to the school and train and do classes. Well then one thing led to another I was there for years ended up getting like black belts and all that stuff. But then my got my first coaching job. The guy that owned the place says, hey, we needed an assistant instructor to help teach warm-ups and private lessons and stuff. Are you interested? I go, sure. I'm here every day anyway, I might as well get paid for it. So started doing that. But then when I'm like a teenager, I'm doing private lessons with six-year-olds, 60-year-olds, teaching classes, all the things. So that was beginning stages of me coaching, those beginning stages me learning how to communicate and like as you talk to a six-year-old differently than a 60 year old and all the different things. And then that's where I found my fascination with physiology and like biomechanics and all that stuff. So that's when I went to college. And I'm like, well, I guess I'm gonna be a physical therapist had no idea I wanted to be, like, go that route. Actually, I didn't want to necessarily, I'm just my thought was, what can I do that makes okay money that I tolerate the most, which is not the way to approach being successful and happy. So that's what that's the route that I went. But I struggled like a motherfucker like I like it took me I was wondering like a normal college. It was like a community college, took me four years to get an associate's degree, dropped the class every single semester for the entire four years because I could not handle it mentally. I couldn't handle the load. The learning just wasn't happening. I didn't even really know algebra going into that. I lived in the tutoring center. Anything math related was just like not, you know, I count calories, as a joke, I count calories for a living. But it was a struggle like it was hard, like college was probably the worst. Those were some of the worst four years ever because it was so stressful, because I was just not prepared. It was so overwhelming, all the things. But I got through it, did all that all the stuff. That's why I found out about this cool thing called personal training. And one of the classes I took for my degree was like a CPT prep class essentially. Fell in love with it, I would, they had us doing like training each other at gyms and shit. And it was so much fun. But I've always been entrepreneurial. Like when I was 13, I was going door to door offering to shovel snow and driveways for like 20 bucks. So I've had this entrepreneurial bone, because I also grew up playing drums. And then I started teaching drum lessons. So I've always had like always wanting to do little side hustles and things like that. Yeah. So did that. But then I fell in love with this personal trainer thing. I'm like, oh, this is dope, I get my biomechanic fix, I get to see people before they go to the physical therapist, and this is actually fun. So that's dope, then I go. But then I thought well, I can say getting a normal job. Because at the time I was working for like Papa John's or like a GNC or just normal jobs. I'm like, well, this way I can at least schedule clients between classes, and then make better money. So that's cool. That was my logic. One thing led to another I was working for three different gyms, one of them was independent, and I built an entire personal training company. So but by the time I got there, then I quit all the corporate jobs. And then I was just pursuing my personal training business completely full-time. I was doing like 200 sessions a month soloing it 438 and 9P every day, just grinding my face off, which was great. I learned more than ever, because like I had every client, you couldn't, it was to the point where like, you could give me a client with every single issue you could think of and I'm like, cool. I've had seven of them or whatever.
Amy Ledin 9:37
Because you have so much experience at that point.
Jared Hamilton 9:39
Yeah and I did that for years. And then one thing led to another I decided I didn't want to do personal training thing anymore because 438 or 9P was a grind. That's when I found this online thing. So I started creating content on Instagram.
Amy Ledin 9:52
This is his gift by the way, please go follow him.
Jared Hamilton 9:56
I started creating content on Instagram, had no idea what I was doing, I was like, side by side videos of like a squat, like don't do it this way, do it this way that kind of stuff, hired my first mentor out the gate to teach me how to transition my in-person business online. So one of the best things I ever did the biggest shortcut I ever took was, before I did anything stupid, I hired a mentor to show me how to do it.
Amy Ledin 10:15
Very smart. And I will say to add, we met you at Arete so I already knew meeting you that I'm like, okay, this guy is interested in personal development, because anyone that is investing in themselves at that level is like, I'm serious about change. I'm serious about growth. And immediately I already am like, hey, these are my people.
Jared Hamilton 10:32
Right. Right. Right. So there's that and then from there, it's just been growing the online coaching business and then from since then, I've scaled my company and hired a bunch of people and (inaudible).
Amy Ledin 10:44
You've exploded, you're huge on TikTok, I will say like, TikTok, definitely, that's where I even see you all the time in my explorer, because I don't even purposely follow people. I like to just go to like the one where you just scroll and see what comes out. And then it's like, I like to see who comes up with my algorithm and you come up for me, so.
Jared Hamilton 11:00
The joke is, on TikTok, if you follow him, you'll never see him again.
Amy Ledin 11:03
Exactly. That's why I don't, I think I follow two people on there. It's like recipes. And I never see their stuff now.
Jared Hamilton 11:09
You follow me it never shows you again.
Amy Ledin 11:11
So I definitely think, you and sabotage those two words go together in terms of like your coaching. Where did this, was it a personal struggle for you that made you get so interested in it or was it a like you started to see clients struggle with it? What made you dive so far into this because you are all about the inner work and all about coming from the inside out.
Jared Hamilton 11:34
So for me with this kind of stuff, so I struggled with my own stuff. Growing up, I was a fat kid. I always struggled with all the things that I teach I struggled with. So like all my friends were shredded and had six packs and I was like chunky, Jared, like we talked about on my podcast, like your nickname growing up was Piglet mine is Eeyore.
Amy Ledin 11:51
Oh my gosh.
Jared Hamilton 11:52
Because I was a chunky sad kid is what it was so. So that was one of my nicknames growing up. So because I've also always been a very more emotional person as a whole. So like, like right now like, oh, yeah, beard and tattoos and shit in this like, no, I will try like that. So and then well and that's why it's weird that now like, going full circle, the inner game was like, not my shit. Like, I've always been fascinated by high performers but that was to the extent of it not that long ago, I thought therapy was only for suicidal people and psychopaths. Then where it changed for me was when I started diving into wait, let me take a step back. So I had all that struggles that's why I can resonate with our clients so much. Where I got into the realm of psychology and behavior change and all that stuff, in the deeper levels of stuff is I saw it with our clients first. So what happened was, before that, I really dove into personal development. That's when I like joined things like Arete, and have a mini library at home, all the books, all the things.
Amy Ledin 12:52
And you've invested, like, let's just keep this in mind. If you're listening to him, and you're like, oh, because you're gonna go follow him and you're gonna see how successful he is. You've also invested a lot into yourself.
Jared Hamilton 13:00
Yeah, I'm like, on paper, like, I mean, I added it up like, someone asked me the other day, and I mean, I've invested over six figures in like, personal development coaching over the years and things like that. Well, so I started studying people like psychologists and neuroscientists like Dispenza and Kyle Cease and Dr. Lapera, and all the things in so that opened up a lot for me. So then things really changes when I went to therapy because I thought I was great. Everything is like upstairs, things were fantastic. But I noticed I saw like, well, I'm doing this thing where I want to become astronomically successful. I have crazy goals, all the things, but then I thought to myself, well, I should probably check to make sure I'm handling my stress well, I said because like we see with clients, they think they're losing weight the right way, but starving for three days in the keto diet is not the best thing, but it's all they know. So I thought to myself, I go you know, I want to just do a mental checkup. I feel fine, but I don't want to wait till the sky is falling in case there is something there. At the time my wife was already in therapy had been in therapy for a while, which means the therapist knows all about me because that's how it works. So I said I'll just have a session with her, her name is Pamela, I said I'm also going to have a session with Pamela just to check in on things upstairs. First session, I bawled my fucking eyes out. I'm telling you, she said tell me about your childhood and I started like telling her the exact same story that I've told a million times and I felt this thing coming and coming and I'm like fuck damn it. I didn't think this was gonna happen. And I talked about some of the stuff I struggled with as a kid and then she's like well what were your names and labels and we talked about the way the intricacies of the Eeyore thing or we talked about this and then all of a sudden there is some fucking there so and then I've done therapy since.
Amy Ledin 14:46
Wow, so you live it I mean you really do came from a personal like you've seen these things that you teach successful in yourself, right?
Jared Hamilton 14:56
Yeah. So after I had that blow up and go like my headspace entirely changed, my view of therapy changed. Because as soon as I started therapy, I wanted to also like, it's still a stigma that men are weak little bitches for it. So then I started talking publicly about it. Like, you know, I had a therapy session for the first time and bawled my eyes out, and I would talk about it. What's funny is the amount of men that have come in my DMs and like, hey.
Jared Hamilton 14:56
I bet that's why I think that this episode, because I don't think men talk about it enough and they are hurting just as much.
Jared Hamilton 15:11
Yeah, 100%, 100%. Like, let's put it this way, the majority of my following like, Instagram analytics is like 75-80% women, 95% of our clientele are women. But I have never had more men reach out because of this, so. So then I just went full bore therapy, consistently, inner work, all the things. But then where it got tied to coaching is where things really shifted because after because, you know, then self-awareness grows and like emotional regulation changes. And then what happened was, I started feeling really heavy about what I did for a living, I started to feel like, do I want to coach like, like questioning this stuff? Because at the time, like, I'd already built my business, I had started to scale, I hired employees, like we're growing. And now I'm like, the thing I thought I wanted isn't what I wanted anymore. And so one of the things an early mentor of mine taught me is when you have lack of clarity, you need to go get quiet and be by yourself for a while, and be undistracted. So now it's a running thing I do I have quarterly what I call Jared sabbaticals. To this day, I still do these where, about once a quarter a couple times a year, I literally go get an Airbnb somewhere by myself for several days and just so I can get my brain time to breathe and process and all the things. So the one I went on, though, so in Indiana, it's not hard to find a farm in the middle of nowhere. I got an Airbnb on a farm in the middle of nowhere with a little miniature horse. And so I went and had like three or four days by myself. And I'm like, I'm talking about like, barely cellphone reception. I like sitting by a fire for three hours. Like that kind of stuff. Can't hear the road, can't hear cars, just by myself because I was at the standstill. I'm like, fuck, why don't I want this anymore? Why is this feeling heavy, because at the time, I was just teaching what I would call sustainable fat loss. It was just like, how you can lose weight, working on a couple times a week, eating a doughnut and still losing weight, right, that kind of stuff. But then I noticed a pattern. This is the clarity that I started to get. I noticed a pattern that I didn't market it but we had to do a lot of groundwork with our clients with this deeper stuff before we could send them to fat loss. So let's say Mrs. Jones would come in, she's like, I'm ready to lose weight. We started losing weight and I'm like oh fuck, she binge eats. Okay, I gotta stop the binge eating, then she can get her gonna lose weight, would do it, send her on her way. She's great. Then the next client would come in and they'd be doing great. We go right into fat loss stuff and like, oh, they're sabotaging because their identity is fucked. Okay, I gotta fix this identity, got to change a steak. I do all this stuff, then do all that and then send them on its way and then he's successful. But then I'm like, oh, this is everybody. And I wasn't but I wasn't (inaudible) I wasn't talking about it. I was just doing it like in like coaching because I like oh, I can't do the thing I know I need to do, it's like move into a house and then you find out the foundation's fuck, it's like, okay, I gotta fix this, then I can finally do the other stuff.
Jared Hamilton 15:47
Totally. You are the analogy case, like the foundation one, I'm always like, that is so good.
Jared Hamilton 18:13
So that's how I viewed it from my logical brain. So then I got to thinking to myself, man, I need, I wish-wish there was a world where you did both these things. Like I wish I could build a program that I did both of this stuff like the inner world stuff, the inner game and the outer game stuff. And I go but no one's done it. No one's done it. So I'm like, no competition is dope. What actually to be honest, gives me a lot of hope as we were talking off camera about Kyle Cease, he's got he's a friend now. As a mentor, he's changed a lot for me. Well, Kyle gave me unconscious permission for this because Kyle do the same thing in comedy. He built the most amazing stand up comedy career, and then found out it's not what he wanted. He wanted to get in transformation. He's like, I should just feel like I could do both of these. Wait. And now he does like, both, like transformational communications (inaudible).
Amy Ledin 19:03
Gave himself permission.
Jared Hamilton 19:04
Yeah. And I go, Oh, maybe I could build this. So then I flipped on my entrepreneurial brain and then I redid everything. Now, mind you, as soon as I go okay, this is what I want to do. This is where I feel aligned with emotionally, vibrationally all the things. All the sabotage, all of the imposter syndrome came in. It's like, who do you think you are? You're not a psychologist, you stay in your own fucking lane then other people saying the same thing. And I was like, but I just I feel like I'm supposed to be here with this very specific lane. So I said fuck it and I ran through it, redid all my contents about this stuff. I rebranded the podcast to Dieting From The Inside Out. I redid our entire coaching program and I marketed it like, yo, this is how we process things we're going to do like we're going to diet you from the inside out. First, fix all these things. Then we're going to go into like actual like the fat loss and the transformation and all the stuff. And so I went full bore with all of it and haven't looked back since.
Amy Ledin 20:00
I love it. And I think I want to dive in a couple things there. I think what I love about that, too is you already know that in the person that's coming to you, the fact that they're willing to pause the fat loss for a season just tells you they already have the right mindset, even if it's been forced upon them, because you're like, hey, I'm not letting you diet yet. Because, you know, they want their plan. They're like, chomping at the bit, because they think that's the answer when the reality is like, this is the work that everyone needs to be doing. So talk me through, give me one tactical thing because obviously, people should come take your course and do it. But what's one tactical thing you make every new client do?
Jared Hamilton 20:36
So in the world of the inner game, there's a lot, right? Like, it's like, I use the and think of the inner game as like the term vehicle. Well, there's a lot of categories underneath vehicles, cars, trucks, motorcycles, SUVs, all the things, the inner game is no different. One of the first things we do is identity work, usually one of the first because everything sabotages to your identity, your identity is what governs your unconscious actions, which is 90% of most people. And then everything else sabotages to it. Like we can talk about sabotaging mechanisms, like when you're emotionally triggered, or whatever the case is, but most people just align themselves and their actions with who they think they are. So one of the first things we do is we do identity work. And from a tactical standpoint, when people like okay, well, fuck I've never, I don't I've never even heard identity, until just now so what do I do to, what do I do to fix it? So one of the first things that we do is there's a thing I call the coma letter, it's a concept that I came up with, where, because most people when they need to do the identity work, they've never even heard of anything remotely close, and they're not personal development junkies like you and I are so. So I play out a scenario, I go, okay, I want you to picture this. I said, you're going into brain surgery, something happened, you're going into brain surgery, and the surgeon comes in and says, all right, look Amy, I gotta go do some cool shit upstairs. But there's like a 50/50 shot that I might hit the reset switch. There's like a I have to take this, you know, this tumor out, whatever. But you there's on paper a 50/50 chance, I will hit the reset switch and you will have no recollection of who you are. When you wake up you won't know who mom is, you won't know who dad is, you will you'll be a complete blank slate. So write yourself a letter telling yourself who you actually are. So I'll give you half hour, he disappears. That's a fucking big reality check. But my question is, what would you write because I can guarantee you you're not going to write how much of a binger you are, you're not gonna write how, how lack of confidence you are, you're not going to talk about how you've always been a dieter and you struggled your whole life, you're probably going to write the most superhero story you've ever written. If it was me, I would lie through my fucking teeth.
Amy Ledin 22:37
Yeah, I'm so great at this. This is what I'm doing.
Jared Hamilton 22:39
I would be like, I'm a billionaire. I just went through a tax bankruptcy. So but I have all my assets still, like I would literally write like, the most superhero-like scenario ever. But that's who you are. That's like this reality that you are right now is just just, it's a past, it's an artifact. So that's who you actually are. But then the identity work is aligning your actions and values with that until you have a stack of irrefutable proof you are who you say you are.
Amy Ledin 23:07
I love that. So how because you know, you are someone yesterday and your stories, it was about staying ready. And you obviously have done a lot of identity work on yourself. Teach a little bit about the stay ready. Like why that's so important. Because, I mean, you're a connector. I know you know so many people and I really believe that a lot of people rise to the top because of that they're truly trying to like, add value and but like you said, you came from the homeschool child that was like, couldn't talk. No one would know that. I mean, like, I'm shocked listening to that because you're such a talker, you are like always on like, I know, if I go to your stories, I'm gonna see you in the video there's not like still shots, you're like talking. What did you do to become this person? What is some of the identity shifts? Like do you write? Did you write a letter to yourself? Do you look at that often?
Jared Hamilton 23:59
Yeah, I mean, I've done a lot like all the inner game stuff, but like I teach, to be honest, I haven't looked at it in a minute. To be honest, it would probably be good to I think everyone needs different phases of these letters. Because I think a lot of times too many people, I think it depends on what it is. I think there are some things that I need to go back and have reflective time. But I think it's like, no, we need the next version of that. You know what I mean? Where it's like what's, if we think of like Netflix, like, what's the next season? Like you're looking to the next thing? Well, what's the next version of you? What's the next version of you? You know, like, when I thought I was 23 I thought I was hot shit. Like, I thought I was like, I was getting into business. It's like when I first started making a little bit of money. I was like, fuck, let's roll like I'm killing it. But then now if I had that reality of like a panic attack, or I'm like, I sound like I'll see the Facebook time hops of like content I made three years ago and it's terrible. Like, it's terrible.
Amy Ledin 24:50
Like, what did I do? (inaudible)
Jared Hamilton 24:51
Well, it's no different in leveling up yourself. So I'm gonna see I think right now I'm like, the best things have been, from a communication standpoint, from a these different levels of me, I know, I'm gonna look back in three years, I'm like, what at a fucking (inaudible), you know what I'm saying? So I think it's important to go back and do these, these exercises of like your identity, reinventing yourself, what? Excuse me? What are your values and things like that? I think it's important to do that frequently, or at least on an ongoing basis. So I think that's a big piece of it.
Amy Ledin 25:20
So when you say stay ready, what does that look like for you? Because, you know, you're someone that I mean, I would say in our because we're in a business coaching, you know, group together, you're definitely one of the top dogs. And you are constantly I mean, you put out so much content, you are always doing things. How do you find like, the chutzpah or whatever people say, right inside you to do this? Because obviously, it's not like people go, oh, I'm just gifted with it. It's not, but I want you to
Jared Hamilton 25:49
Yeah, so there's two sides with like, how do I have the oomph to keep doing it? It's, I'm not where I want to be. At the end of the day, I'm not where I want to be I know,
Amy Ledin 25:58
And you have clarity on (inaudible)
Jared Hamilton 25:58
I have clarity on that. But then I also have more clarity on what I have, what's gonna happen if I don't get it. One thing we teach our clients is like, we need our help list. Like, what if you don't do this, what's gonna happen? What's on paper get, it's like, when my favorite analogies to use for it is going into Christmas time. It's like the story of Scrooge, he didn't change his actions until like, I think it was Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come and says, look, motherfucker, this is what's going to happen if you don't change. So I think about that.
Amy Ledin 26:23
I like that, you know, that's so important to what's going to happen if I don't do this.
Jared Hamilton 26:27
Truthfully, because I think when people are struggling or they are in their low season of their life, I think like the happy positive, what's your why, isn't strong enough.
Amy Ledin 26:35
No, it isn't. And that's, I mean, even Tony Robbins talks about that, like you make decisions based on pain or pleasure. And so it's why sometimes the pain is going to pull me faster than the pleasure because let's face it, I want a six-pack. But I mean, not that much. You know what I mean? Like, we can sit in that pleasure, but the pain is of going in my closet and nothing fitting for my next you know, I mean, that would propel me more.
Jared Hamilton 26:57
Totally, totally. So I think for me, it's like, it's just a discipline thing. It's part of just who I am, it's from an identity standpoint is I am consistent, I do the same things I said I'm going to do, also my expectations are on point is I know, I'm going to have to make more content than what I think that I need to make, I'm going to not want to show up all the things. So it's like with a weight loss client, they're going to not be motivated. They're going it's going to take longer than what they want. So I have that expectation. So I just it's part of what I do. But then the stay ready stuff is I know this was talking about my story yesterday that I just know these unicorn moments and these opportunities. They're called unicorn moments because they don't come around that often. But if you jump on them, you are literally shortcutting all these different areas in your life and I've been fortunate enough in the past. I had like three yesterday to be honest, I like I talked about three mini ones yesterday, but then like over the last year, I've had so many opportunities jump at me because A, I'm in alignment with them and then I, part of me believes I deserve them because of the effort I put in because I do the things most people won't do. So I feel like I deserve things that most people don't don't get. But then the other side is I don't know when they're going to come around. So I'm going to do my due diligence of working hard, being consistent, doing all the things knowing what I want in than just waiting for them. Not waiting, like sitting here twiddling my thumbs but I
Jared Hamilton 26:57
Right, you're still doing action while you're knowing (inaudible).
Jared Hamilton 27:14
Right. It's like a weight loss client like, no the weight's gonna drop. No, the clothes are gonna fit but it's up to them to be consistent. We just don't know when that day is gonna come. Right? So that's how I view it. But a mentor of mine early on said made that statement he said just stay ready. So you don't have to get ready because getting ready. It's often too late. So that so it's almost like in a weird way every day. I'm like, all right, is today the day? Okay, no, that's fine.
Amy Ledin 28:43
I love that. And you know, on on my podcast, we talk a lot about you got to put it out there because if you're not open to it, it's like you saying you got to have clarity. It mean if you're just saying you want to get in shape, it's just not clear enough for your brain, right? It's the same with like coming to this I went into it going okay, what am I expecting out of this? Okay, I'm going to meet two people that are going to change my business. I'm going to walk away with three things like really specific so that my brain looks for it. It's like hey, where are the two people I'm waiting? Where are they here at this event? So I think you do a lot of that I kind of take notes because you seem to be the connector.
Jared Hamilton 29:20
Well, and the thing is to I think the other piece is I just know you're one conversation, one moment, one piece of content away from your life, never been the same like this, like last week, I had because of one video that I made or one podcast episode I made. I think like maybe eight months ago, someone reshared it in someone else's Facebook group. That person has happened to be the operations manager for one of the biggest calorie tracking apps and she wants me to write a course for them and send their two to three million monthly subscribers to me.
Amy Ledin 29:52
That's insane.
Jared Hamilton 29:53
Right? So like, which is dope but what if I didn't make that piece of content? What if the way I wasn't present on that piece of content about I think it was on binge eating didn't resonate well, it wouldn't have gotten shared on the exact time she saw it. So then when I saw the email come through, I scheduled a call with her ASAP. Or that's just one example or whatever it may be like.
Amy Ledin 30:15
And you believe that you, I think people don't believe in nothing themselves, like I am worthy of good things happening to me. And I am expecting like when you said earlier, like I expect it. And that is a huge, you know, opening yourself up to all of these opportunities.
Jared Hamilton 30:30
Well, and then I also realized, I'm not going to get the 10 out of 10 on the first shot, like for example, let's say one of my big goals is I want to close a stadium out. One of my big speaking goals is I want to close out a stadium like
Amy Ledin 30:43
That's what I was gonna say, what's your big, crazy, hairy goal?
Jared Hamilton 30:45
Kevin Hart level stadium close out, I saw one of Kevin Hart's, one of his specials, like on Hulu or Netflix or whatever, he literally closed down a 360 stadium. And it was like every seat was full. I want to do that I want to close the stadium out. But I know I'm not just gonna have an opportunity to close it close the stadium out from right where I'm at now, but there but like one of the things that happened yesterday, I got invited to the event that we're out, I got invited to speak on a business panel on it on Friday. So I said, absolutely. I have no idea what to talk about. I have no idea what the thing is about. But is it in the direction of the thing that I want? 1000% Because right now, I'm telling you, I'm probably not ready to close out a stadium yet. I would look like a babbling idiot. But I bet like in front of 500 people, I will probably be okay.
Jared Hamilton 31:06
Right. It was until you did coaching con, right? Last year. So that was probably like, you're just slowly building your (inaudible) gonna be at the stadium.
Jared Hamilton 31:42
Yeah. Well, and that's the thing is, I think, to me, people like, yeah, you want to be clear on what you want. But also like, it's going to take several dots being connected.
Amy Ledin 31:50
It's like with fat loss, okay, I want to lose 90 pounds. Well, you're not going to be there for a while. But you got to lose the five to lose the 10 to lose the 15. So I got to speak to five people before I speak to 10. Before then I'm in front of an audience, you know, so wow, I like that. What is, in your business and now with all the people that you've worked with, what do you think is the biggest mistake that females make, like in you know, assuming what they need done versus what you think is the number one thing that they need help with?
Jared Hamilton 32:21
I think most people aren't ready for weight loss yet. I think there's way too many foundational pieces that aren't there. I think so many people, because of expectations, because of diet culture, because of impatience, I think people are just too willing to jump right into fat loss. But it's kind of like that house thing. You just bought a house and you're ready to make room additions. But every day the wall's cracking because the foundation's fucked, that has to be fixed first. I think most people, it's why the way that we coach people, it's why stage one for us, we call it Dieting From The Inside Out is because most people need some metabolic work. They've been eating 900 in total calories a day, like that's not a foundation to lose fat from. So we, from the inner side and the outer side, we need to make sure metabolically you're in a good place. And from a habitual side, you're in a good place. Because like at the end of the day, like if you can't be consistent for more than 14 days, like it doesn't matter what you do for those 14 days. But then the inner game piece as well, because one of the questions we ask almost everyone, when especially if someone's not bought in on the dining from the inside out stuff, they're like, Okay, I get it, but like, why can't I go into fat loss yet? My favorite question that solves it every time it's like, oh, cool. If I could snap my fingers and the 50 pounds disappears, is it staying off? It's a yes or no question. And most people go, ah, probably not. I go okay, well, why? They go well, I'd still be binge eating on the weekends. But I'd still be emotionally eating in the pantry every bad day. Well, then I know I'd subconsciously sabotage it because every time I lose 10 pounds, and I jump on the scale, I binge eat and I fall off and whatever. My relationship with food will still be horrible. My metabolism would still be fucked. I'd have no idea how to keep the weight off and they just go down the list. I go okay, so if you just admitted magic genie powers does not get your problem solved why are we white knuckling through weight loss? It's illogical at this point. So then I rephrase I go well, what if we flip that question? What if I said if I snap my fingers and binge eating is gone, food relationship healed, your inner game is on point, you're metabolically great, your habits are great, you're consistent. You're disciplined. Do you think weight loss would be that big of a deal? And they go I feel like it would just happen. I go it would exactly just happen.
Amy Ledin 34:21
Yeah it'd be background for you, essentially, right?
Jared Hamilton 34:24
It's most people are putting the cart before the horse so to speak. So that's that's the biggest piece is we have to make sure foundationally you're in a good place. It's why like my entire IP is all dieting from the inside out.
Amy Ledin 34:34
Totally. So one, where can people find you and two, what is in the future for you right now? Like what are you working on?
Jared Hamilton 34:43
Yeah, so I hang out most days on Instagram, TikTok @RealJaredHamilton. My podcast is Dieting From The Inside Out, available everywhere. As far as what I'm excited on right now is one, just keep scaling the business and just keep growing and fine-tuning and helping. Really enjoying getting into speaking like I want to do more at the podcast, doing a lot with it. And just a lot bigger speaking things in the future, I just got invited to speak for an event in 2025, another coaching event in Vegas, which is pretty cool. And then it's getting close to the stadium.
Amy Ledin 35:16
I love when you have stuff like this recorded too, because you're gonna look back on this and be like I because I remember Tom Bilyeu, actually, he had, on one of his podcasts, that he was going to be bigger than Disney. And he says it all the time, right? And I'm like, I love when people are willing to put their scary dreams because here's the thing, someone could be listening right now that listens to you that has some connection with someone they know that they're suddenly going to go, okay, because you put that out there. I have a stadium that I want you to, you know what I mean, I know an event that you could be perfect for. And that is the only, and if people don't share those things, it never comes out. What is a book, two books actually, that you think everyone should read?
Jared Hamilton 35:54
War of Art by Steven Pressfield. It's, I've been talking about it a lot lately. The whole concept is that resistance is required.
Amy Ledin 36:01
Good. I gotta read it. Because that's one on my list.
Jared Hamilton 36:03
It is one of my favorites. It's so good. The whole book is on the resistance. When you, whenever you do anything new and noteworthy or pursuing something greater than yourself, whatever it is, is, the resistance isn't just going to happen but it is required to get where you want to go. There's just no way around it. And then one of my favorite books at all times. I always have a copy in my bag to give to people who when I feel like it really would resonate is As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.
Amy Ledin 36:29
Oh, that's two choices I was surprised. So these are yeah, I thought you would do Joe Dispenza. I wondered (inaudible) I'm sure it's on your list. Now these are two books I've not read. These would be ones I want to
Jared Hamilton 36:40
I'm in the middle of Joe's book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself. Fantastic. Like humor. It's probably one of my top five. But those were the first two that just were my first come out was The War of Art. Not the Art of War. That's a different book. But War of Art by Steven Pressfield. And As a Man Thinketh by James Allen.
Amy Ledin 36:58
Awesome. Okay, well, I have really enjoyed this today (inaudible) I think we need to do another one at some point where we can dive into something else. Thank you for coming on. I appreciate it.
Jared Hamilton 37:08
Of course. Thank you for having me.
Amy Ledin 37:09
Okay, I'm on a mission. As you know, if you've been following along, I have a goal to be at top 100 podcasts. And it's less about that top 100 and more about I want to make an impact. I want more people to hear F* It! and learn from all of the mistakes that I've made, along with me bringing on really special guests for you. So my ask here is this. I want you to screenshot this episode today and share it on your social media, share it with a friend, you know, tag me in it. Go give me a review, of course, if you're really feeling it, and rate me. You know, this is the only way things are gonna get seen here. And in a big world of tons and tons of podcasts, I'm hoping that you're going to choose mine and help me on my mission.
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DISCLAIMER: The opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints expressed by the hosts and guests on this podcast do not necessarily represent or reflect the official policy, opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints of Disenyo.co LLC and its employees.
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