Hosted by Major Tom and Doc Awesome, Certified Rotten takes a closer look to the underappreciated, often-lamented masterpieces of the Hollywood garbage bin.
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Based on the popular video game, Milla Jovovich and Michelle Rodriguez star as the leaders of a commando team who must break into "the hive," a vast underground genetics laboratory operated by the powerful Umbrella Corporation. There, a deadly virus has been unleashed, killing the lab's personnel and resurrecting them as the evil Un-dead. The team …
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The Monster Squad (1987)
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Five youngsters find themselves up against the combined might of Dracula, the Mummy, the Gill Man and Frankenstein's Monster who arrive in town in search of a magic amulet.Door CertifiedRotten
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It's Doc Awesome's birthday which means he gets to pick whatever movie he likes for us to review, rotten or not rotten. On this episode, Ryan Gosling stars as Driver, a mysterious Hollywood stuntman and mechanic who moonlights as a getaway driver and finds himself in trouble when he helps out his neighbor. Guest: Nurse Fiancée.…
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Mortal Kombat (1995)
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The Lightning God Rayden guides warrior Liu Kang, police detective Sonja Blade, and martial arts movie star Johnny Cage to a remote island to compete in the Shaolin Tournament known as Mortal Kombat. If the Outworld wins the Shaolin Tournament ten times in a row, they can enter the Realm of Earth and take over. They have been victorious the last ni…
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Street Fighter (1994)
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Gen. Bison (Raul Julia), the evil dictator of Shadaloo, captures a busload of relief workers and holds them for ransom. Col. Guile (Jean-Claude Van Damme) leads an international strike force to invade Shadaloo and rescue the hostages. Along the way, Guile recruits Chun-Li (Ming-Na Wen), a reporter and martial-arts expert whose father was killed by …
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Silent Hill (2006)
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The eerie and deserted ghost town of Silent Hill draws a young mother desperate to find a cure for her only child's illness. Unable to accept the doctor's diagnosis that her daughter should be permanently institutionalized for psychiatric care, Rose flees with her child, heading for the abandoned town in search of answers -- and ignoring the protes…
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Super Mario Bros (1993)
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Brooklyn plumbers Mario (Bob Hoskins) and Luigi (John Leguizamo) rescue Princess Daisy from King Koopa (Dennis Hopper) and the Goombas in a dinosaur world. Guest: Tonia Malito, the Dealer for the People.Door CertifiedRotten
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The Three Musketeers (1993)
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D'Artagnan (Chris O'Donnell) travels to Paris hoping to become a musketeer, one of the French king's elite bodyguards, only to discover that the corps has been disbanded by conniving Cardinal Richelieu (Tim Curry), who secretly hopes to usurp the throne. Fortunately, Athos (Kiefer Sutherland), Porthos (Oliver Platt) and Aramis (Charlie Sheen) have …
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Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves (1991)
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Nobleman crusader Robin of Locksley (Kevin Costner) breaks out of a Jerusalem prison with the help of Moorish fellow prisoner Azeem (Morgan Freeman) and travels back home to England. But upon arrival he discovers his dead father in the ruins of his family estate, killed by the vicious sheriff of Nottingham (Alan Rickman). Robin and Azeem join force…
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13th Warrior (1999)
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A Muslim ambassador exiled from his homeland, Ahmad ibn Fadlan (Antonio Banderas) finds himself in the company of Vikings. While the behavior of the Norsemen initially offends ibn Fadlan, the more cultured outsider grows to respect the tough, if uncouth, warriors. During their travels together, ibn Fadlan and the Vikings get word of an evil presenc…
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The Crow: City of Angels
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After mechanic Ashe (Vincent Perez) and his son (Eric Acosta) witness a murder, they are captured and killed by drug lord Judah (Richard Brooks). Soon, a young artist named Sarah (Mia Kirshner) meets Ashe, who has just returned from the dead. Sarah, who had known a man resurrected into the vengeful warrior the Crow years ago, explains to Ashe that …
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The Quick and the Dead (1995)
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A mysterious woman gunslinger, Ellen (Sharon Stone), saunters into the town of Redemption looking for revenge. Her father was killed by the town's sadistic mayor, Herod (Gene Hackman), who is in the midst of organizing a quick-draw tournament. The lady enters, joining a cast of miscreants and outlaws for a brutal competition in which the loser dies…
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Lake Placid (1999)
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When a mysterious creature violently kills a man in a Maine lake, Jack Wells (Bill Pullman), the local game warden, looks into the bizarre case, along with Sheriff Hank Keough (Brendan Gleeson) and visiting paleontologist Kelly Scott (Bridget Fonda). Looking for clues in a tooth that the beast left behind, Kelly and the others eventually locate the…
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On an island research facility, Dr. Susan McAlester (Saffron Burrows) is harvesting the brain tissue of DNA-altered sharks as a possible cure for Alzheimer's disease. When the facility's backers send an executive (Samuel L. Jackson) to investigate the experiments, a routine procedure goes awry and a shark starts attacking the researchers. Now, with…
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After escaping an attack by what he claims was a 70-foot shark, Jonas Taylor must confront his fears to save those trapped in a sunken submersible. Also the Rotten Crew breaks down Captain Marvel. Guest: Jake Naked.Door CertifiedRotten
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Filmmaker Terri Flores (Jennifer Lopez) is traveling deep in the Amazon jungle looking for a forgotten tribe. Terri and her crew, which includes an anthropologist (Eric Stoltz) and a cameraman (Ice Cube), come across Paul (Jon Voight), who is stranded on the riverbank. He offers to help them find the tribe, but his secretive behavior puts everyone …
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No Holds Barred (1989)
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A TV-network boss (Kurt Fuller) pits a wrestler called Zeus against a wrestler called Rip (Hulk Hogan) in a racial match. Featuring another episode of Epic Impression Battles of Cinema: Wrestling Edition. Guest: Johnny Cash (Not the Singer).Door CertifiedRotten
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Days of Thunder (1990)
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In the fast-paced world of NASCAR, a rivalry brews between rookie hotshot Cole Trickle (Tom Cruise) and veteran racer Rowdy Burns (Michael Rooker). When both of them are seriously injured in competition, the former bitter rivals become close friends. With Cole's spirits restored by a romance with neurosurgeon Dr. Claire Lewicki (Nicole Kidman), and…
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After reclaiming the boxing championship title, Rocky Balboa (Sylvester Stallone) plans to retire and live with his wife, Adrian (Talia Shire). However, during an exhibition match, Rocky's friend Apollo Creed (Carl Weathers) is mercilessly beaten to death by hulking Russian newcomer Ivan Drago (Dolph Lundgren). Rocky vows payback against Drago and …
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After witnessing the execution of serial killer Edgar Reese (Elias Koteas), whom he arrested, police detective John Hobbes (Denzel Washington), and his partner, Jonesy (John Goodman), are soon investigating another murderer whose mode of operation is eerily similar to Reese's. In the course of the investigation, Hobbes meets theology professor Gret…
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Geophysicist Dr. Josh Keyes (Aaron Eckhart) discovers that an unknown force has caused the earth's inner core to stop rotating. With the planet's magnetic field rapidly deteriorating, our atmosphere literally starts to come apart at the seams with catastrophic consequences. To resolve the crisis, Keyes, along with a team of the world's most gifted …
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End of Days (1999)
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A private security guard finds himself caught up in an apocalyptic conflict. The Devil's only chance of getting out of his eternal prison is to mate with a chosen girl in the last hour of the millennium, and the guard finds himself having to protect the woman from an enemy in whom he does not even believe. Also, the Rotten Crew puts forward their b…
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Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)
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After snarky youth Kevin McCallister (Macaulay Culkin) loses track of his father at the airport, he mistakenly gets on a plane headed for New York City -- while the rest of the McCallisters fly to Florida. Now alone in the Big Apple, Kevin cons his way into a room at the Plaza Hotel and begins his usual antics. But when Kevin discovers that the Sti…
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Los Angeles policeman Lt. Marion "Cobra" Cobretti (Sylvester Stallone) finds himself at the center of a spate of murders carried out by a secret society called New Order: killers who select "weak" members of society for extermination. As the murder rate rises, Cobra takes model Ingrid (Brigitte Nielsen) into protective custody after she witnesses N…
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Just-paroled army ranger Cameron Poe (Nicolas Cage) is headed back to his wife (Monica Potter), but must fly home aboard a prison transport flight dubbed "Jailbird" with some of the worst criminals living. Along with Diamond Dog (Ving Rhames) and Baby-O (Mykelti Williamson), genius serial killer Cyrus "The Virus" Grissom (John Malkovich) unleashes …
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Masters of the Universe (1987)
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When the evil Skeletor (Frank Langella) finds a mysterious power called the Cosmic Key, he becomes nearly invincible. However, courageous warrior He-Man (Dolph Lundgren) locates inventor Gwildor (Billy Barty), who created the Key and has another version of it. During a battle, one of the Keys is transported to Earth, where it is found by teenagers …
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When a massive earthquake rocks the city of Los Angeles, Emergency Management department head Mike Roark (Tommy Lee Jones) returns from his vacation to help with the city's response. After geologist Dr. Amy Barnes (Anne Heche) warns that a volcano may be forming in sewer tunnels, another severe earthquake unleashes the lava flowing underfoot, threa…
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During the approach of the most powerful storm in decades, university professor Dr. Jo Harding (Helen Hunt) and an underfunded team of students prepare the prototype for Dorothy, a ground-breaking tornado data-gathering device conceived by her estranged husband, Bill (Bill Paxton). When Harding tells Bill that Dorothy is ready for testing -- and th…
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After the melting of the polar ice caps, most of the globe is underwater. Some humans have survived, and even fewer still, notably the Mariner (Kevin Costner), have adapted to the ocean by developing gills. A loner by nature, the Mariner reluctantly befriends Helen (Jeanne Tripplehorn) and her young companion, Enola (Tina Majorino), as they escape …
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When an asteroid threatens to collide with Earth, NASA honcho Dan Truman (Billy Bob Thornton) determines the only way to stop it is to drill into its surface and detonate a nuclear bomb. This leads him to renowned driller Harry Stamper (Bruce Willis), who agrees to helm the dangerous space mission provided he can bring along his own hotshot crew. A…
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The Black Witch Duology
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In October of 1994, three film students travel to Maryland to make a student film about a local urban legend. They went into the woods on a two day hike to find the Blair Witch, and never came back. One year later, the students film and video were found in the woods. The footage was compiled and made into a movie and released in 1999 as The Blair W…
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In an America ravaged by crime and overcrowded prisons, the government sanctions an annual 12-hour period during which all criminal activity -- including murder -- is legal. James Sandin (Ethan Hawke) and his family face the ultimate test when an intruder drags the vicious outside world into their home. James, Mary (Lena Headey) and their two child…
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Truth or Dare (2018)
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Olivia, Lucas and a group of their college friends travel to Mexico for one last getaway before graduation. While there, a stranger convinces one of the students to play a seemingly harmless game of truth or dare with the others. Once the game starts, it awakens something evil -- a demon which forces the friends to share dark secrets and confront t…
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The Faculty (1998)
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Like so many schools today, Herrington High has passed its prime. Its walls are grimy, its textbooks outdated, its teachers burned out. Yet its corridors are packed with the future of America - loners, leaders, hipsters, nerds, brains and jocks. Like teenagers everywhere, they struggle with parents who don't get it, teachers who never had it and ho…
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The Mummy is set in Egypt, where over 3,000 years ago the high priest Imhotep (Arnold Vosloo) was given the all-important assignment of preparing the recently dead for their journey into the afterlife. However, Imhotep made one terrible mistake - he became smitten with Anck-Su-Namun, the mistress of the Pharaoh himself. Driven mad by jealousy and l…
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House II: the Second Story (1987)
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Jesse (Arye Gross) moves to his biological parents' house with his girlfriend Kate (Lar Park-Lincoln) and soon he hosts his friend Charlie (Jonathan Stark) with his girlfriend, Lana (Amy Yasbeck). Jesse reads old documents and decides to go to the local cemetery with Charlie to unbury his grand grand grandfather to seek out an ancient powerful Azte…
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Poltergeist II: the Other Side
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The Countdown to Halloween Horrorthon continues with 1986’s Poltergeist II: the Other Side. The Freelings have escaped their haunted house, which is now being studied by paranormal investigators, including shaman Taylor (Will Sampson). When Taylor realizes that the Beast, masquerading as the Rev. Kane (Julian Beck), knows where young Carol Anne Fre…
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Maximum Overdrive (1986)
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After a comet causes a radiation storm on Earth, machines come to life and turn against their makers. Holed up in a North Carolina truck stop, a group of survivors must fend for themselves against a mass of homicidal trucks. A diner cook, Bill Robinson (Emilio Estevez), emerges as the unlikely leader of the pack, attempting to find an escape plan f…
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The Mangler (1995)
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When an accident involving a folding machine at an old laundry occurs, detective John Hunton (Ted Levine) decides to investigate. What he finds is the owner of the laundry, Bill Gartley (Robert Englund). Meanwhile the folding machine has acquired a taste for the flesh of human beings, but is there more to Bill Gartley than meets the eye, and does h…
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When his young children are abducted by his old nemesis, Capt. Hook (Dustin Hoffman), middle-aged lawyer Peter Banning (Robin Williams) returns to his magical origins as Peter Pan. Peter must revisit a foggy past in which he abandoned Neverland for family life, leaving Tinkerbell (Julia Roberts) and the Lost Boys to fend for themselves. Given their…
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Los Angeles is enduring a heat wave and a crime wave, so the pressure on police officer Michael Harrigan (Danny Glover) to solve a strange string of murders is mounting. Harrigan thinks the culprit can be found among the warring gangs and drug cartels, but FBI Special Agent Peter Keyes (Gary Busey) knows the horrible truth: Their killer is a fearso…
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Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare
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Murderous ghoul Freddy Krueger (Robert Englund) has slaughtered every last child in his hometown. He ventures on to a new location, scouting fresh young victims to hack up with his finger blades. He arrives in a small town in which his long-lost daughter, Maggie (Lisa Zane), works as a therapist for troubled youths. He attempts to recruit her for h…
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This superhero adventure finds Batman (George Clooney) and his partner, Robin (Chris O'Donnell), attempting to the foil the sinister schemes of a deranged set of new villains, most notably the melancholy Mr. Freeze (Arnold Schwarzenegger), who wants to make Gotham into an arctic region, and the sultry Poison Ivy (Uma Thurman), a plant-loving femme …
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In 15th-century Transylvania, Vlad III (Luke Evans), prince of Wallachia, is known as a just ruler. With his beloved wife, Mirena (Sarah Gadon), Vlad has brokered a prolonged period of peace and ensured that his people are protected, especially from the Ottoman Empire. However, when Sultan Mehmed II (Dominic Cooper) demands 1,000 of the country's b…
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When the Event Horizon, a spacecraft that vanished years earlier, suddenly reappears, a team is dispatched to investigate the ship. Accompanied by the Event Horizon's creator, William Weir (Sam Neill), the crew of the Lewis and Clark, led by Capt. Miller (Laurence Fishburne), begins to explore the seemingly abandoned vessel. However, it soon become…
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In this 2006 sci-fi action film, pseudo-vampires called hemophages are being driven to extinction by the villainous Archministry and its leader, Daxus (Nick Chinlund). The only woman standing in the way is Violet (Milla Jovovich) who utilizes superhuman powers and advanced technology to wage war against the humans. But when she discovers a boy (Cam…
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In a dystopian future, Joseph Dredd, the most famous Judge, is convicted for a crime he did not commit and must face his murderous counterpart. The Rotten Crew discuss and dissect the 1995 box office bomb with this week's guest, Jake Naked.Door CertifiedRotten
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