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Chapter 1: Broken Family Alex started at the faded photograph pinned above their desk, a relic from a simpler time. It was a picture of their family,smiling and carefree,taken before everything had changed.The edges of the photo were worn, and the faces seemed almost like ghost from a distant past.Alex’s gaze lingered on their parents’ smiling faces, a stark contrast to the tension-filled conversations they now had. Their apartment,though modest,was filled with the vibrant energy of their dr ...
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F*ck Bubble

Brian Pearson

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A decades-long friendship is torn asunder after an encounter with a stranger in the desert. Each episode I’ll be reading a new chapter from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to a close friend. F*ck Bubble is the near twenty year true story of a 1999 hookup in New York City that morphed into a deep but often turbulent friendship – one that got even more complicated after an unlikely encounter in the Utah desert in 2016. It’s a story of serendipity and how revisiting the past can sometim ...
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Through the Storm* follows Alex, a young artist struggling with financial strain and family pressures after moving to the city to chase their dreams. As they face professional setbacks and personal guilt, Alex must balance their passion with their family’s needs. With support from a friend and a renewed resolve, Alex learns to navigate their challe…
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Through the Storm* follows Alex, a young artist struggling with financial strain and family pressures after moving to the city to chase their dreams. As they face professional setbacks and personal guilt, Alex must balance their passion with their family’s needs. With support from a friend and a renewed resolve, Alex learns to navigate their challe…
  continue reading
 
Through the Storm follows Alex, a young artist struggling with financial strain and family pressures after moving to the city to chase their dreams. As they face professional setbacks and personal guilt, Alex must balance their passion with their family’s needs. With support from a friend and a renewed resolve, Alex learns to navigate their challen…
  continue reading
 
Through the Storm follows Alex, a young artist struggling with financial strain and family pressures after moving to the city to chase their dreams. As they face professional setbacks and personal guilt, Alex must balance their passion with their family’s needs. With support from a friend and a renewed resolve, Alex learns to navigate their challen…
  continue reading
 
This episode, I read the final chapter, Sky Holds the Sun, from my nonfiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my good friend, Desiree, in Park City, Utah. Sky Holds the Sun is about the bigger story, the one when, after everything, it all begins to make sense. It's about the magic of happenstance, of being in the right place at the right time, about fo…
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Episode 17 of F*ck Bubble comes in two parts, both with my friend Joe in Jersey City. This second half of the episode begins with the reading of Chapter 18, Arrowhead. This chapter recounts some magical thinking employed on my part re: Gunner while staying at friend's mountain cabin high above Los Angeles. As snow falls at night, a miscommunication…
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Episode 17 of F*ck Bubble comes in two parts, both with my friend Joe in Jersey City. Joe and I met as college students in Boston during the mid-nineties. He's only ten days younger than me (although he still looks like he's twenty-two). We talk about what it was like coming out during the dawn of the internet age; the clubs (Avalon, Quest, Campus)…
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This episode with Rupert in Norway comes in two parts. In this second half, I get right into the reading of Chapter 17, Rest Area, from my nonfiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble. This chapter of F*ck Bubble documents the vapor trail my relationship with Mack became shortly after our tense and revealing last meeting in San Francisco in May of 2017. No l…
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This episode with my friend Rupert in Norway comes in two parts. In this first half, Rupert and I go deep, talking about our meeting dance-floor tangential at Mardi Gras in Sydney, Australia, in 2002, when we were both living there full-time. I would say that perhaps more than any of my other beloved friends who've been on the podcast, my relations…
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This episode, I'll be reading chapter 16, Parklife, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble to my friend Sam in the Shreveport, Louisiana. Parklife documents one of the most cinematic and dramatic lunches I've ever had, and I didn't even eat anything. After an already heady visit with Mack in San Francisco, I agreed to meet him one more time at…
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This episode, I'll be reading the 15th chapter, Mist, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble to my friend Rocky in the Catskill Mountains of Upstate, New York. In May of 2017 I traveled up to SF to help Missy with a weeks-long work project. There, both my illusions and intuition caught up with me. Truth, clarity, and acceptance arrived with th…
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This episode, I'll be reading the 14th chapter, Jewels, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble to my friend Connor in Portland, OR. Jewels is about a challenging but illuminating visit I took to San Francisco in February 2017. Having already "broken off" whatever it was I had (or didn't have) with Gunner a few weeks prior, things still felt te…
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This episode, I'll be reading the 13th chapter, If, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble to my good friend and sometimes writing partner, Patryce, in LA. If is about those days and weeks following my Denver to LA road trip with Gunner in January of 2017. Having no regret about going, I was nonetheless coming to terms with what I had gotten m…
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This episode, I'll be reading the 12th chapter, Trail Mix, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble to Robin in Hudson, New York. Trail Mix is about my finally meeting Gunner face to face. In January of 2017, I flew from LA to Denver to drive with him in a packed Subaru back to California – the first part of his new life after coming out to his …
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This episode, I'll be reading two short chapters, La Condition Masculine and 2 Wicky, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend, Missy, in San Francisco, California. Chapter Ten, La Condition Masculine, is about my getting to know Gunner after our meeting on Grindr in Utah. We spend hours over the phone talking about our lives and o…
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This episode, I'll be reading the ninth chapter, Linen, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend and former neighbor, Dayna, in Pasadena, California. Linen is about the past and the future merging beneath a bold Western sky. My having met Gunner on Grindr in the wilds of Utah, Mack doesn't skip a beat, making his presence known. Bu…
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Part II of my conversation with my friend, Andres, in Edinburgh, Scotland, starts off with the reading of Chapter 8, Mesa, from my non-fiction manuscript, Fuck Bubble. By 2016, Mack and I were both living in California: he in SF; me in LA. For a while things seemed to be going well but by the end of the year Mack once again began to prioritize his …
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This episode comes in two parts, both with my friend, Andres, in Edinburgh, Scotland. In this first half of our conversation, Andres, who grew up between Spain and Brazil, and I talk about our meeting in Sydney, Australia, where we had both gone to live for awhile in 2001/2002. Still in our twenties, we met at a gay bar on Oxford Street and have si…
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This episode, I'll be reading the seventh chapter, Tamalpais High, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend Eric in Los Feliz, California. Tamalpais High is all about my relationship with the people and landscape of California: past, present and future. Having moved back to LA in 2016, I was regularly seeing Mack, who seemed to be …
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This episode, I'll be reading the sixth chapter, To the West Coast, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend Ham & Eggs who was here with me on the Connecticut shoreline. To the West Coast documents a period of time, roughly 2011 to 2015, when I saw little if any of Mack and would only occasionally interact with him over the phone.…
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This episode, I'll be reading the fifth chapter, Shark, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend Marc in St. Francisville, Louisiana. Shark details a time in my life when everything fell apart: my parents were in a car accident, my estranged brother re-entered my life after a fifteen year absence and our father died. Meanwhile, Mac…
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This episode, I'll be reading the fourth chapter, Golden Path, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friends Paulina and Mr. M. in Manhattan. Golden Path is about romantic reckonings; about freeing oneself from obsession and finding one’s footing. It was about a time (the late-aughts) when I had to reconsider, with the help of Nature a…
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This episode, I'll be reading the third chapter, Eye in the Sky, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend Marianna in Greenpoint, Brooklyn. I met Marianna in 2015 at a gathering in Sagaponack, NY. Eye In the Sky is about that moment in time (the mid-aughts) when technology was changing the way New Yorkers saw one another, the way t…
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This episode, I'll be reading the second chapter, Sick Times, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my friend Zech in Bushwick, Brooklyn. I met Zech back in 2016 while visiting a close family friend's lake cottage in Upstate, New York. Sick Times is about Mack coming back into my life in 2004, nearly five years after our last terse commun…
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This episode, I read the preface and first chapter, Bicep, from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to my beloved friend, Fabiano. I met Fabiano on the sidewalk in Rio de Janeiro back in 1999 at the beginning of an extended South American backpacking trip. The episode essentially comes in two parts, and two hemispheres. The first half, recorded…
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Each episode I’ll be reading a new chapter from my non-fiction manuscript, F*ck Bubble, to a close friend. F*ck Bubble is the near twenty year true story of a 1999 hookup in New York City that morphed into a deep but often turbulent friendship – one that got even more complicated after an unlikely encounter in the Utah desert in 2016. It’s a story …
  continue reading
 
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