Manage episode 285849113 series 2857625
Today Zoe speaks to Laura Gallagher, a mother and author also known as Robo Mummy.
They discuss Laura’s fertility struggles, how to normalise differing journeys to parenthood and Laura’s incredible children’s book ‘Robobabies’.
Laura wanted to write a book for children to tell them all about the different ways families are made. Although written for children, it is a book for everyone as we all need educating in this subject so we can break down societal taboos.
- Laura met her husband Joe over a decade ago. They met in a nightclub and since first meeting they spoke every single day – they knew very early on they were going to be together for a long time.
- They got married in 2015, bought a flat and spent a couple of years enjoying life. After a period of not actively trying not to have a baby nothing happened and Laura had a feeling something ‘wasn’t right’.
- After they had some tests privately, they realised that it was Laura’s eggs that weren’t of good quality and had the ‘age’ of someone much older. So, time was especially important for them. When Laura found this out she was shocked and felt lonely and low. She didn’t have anyone to share this with.
- Laura underwent her first round of IVF, she did anything and everything she possibly could to try and make it work the first time. Many people told her not to get her hopes up but incredibly they were successful.
- Becoming pregnant on the first round gave Laura anxiety throughout the pregnancy. She felt she had lucked out and the people surrounding her had told her so many stories that she felt scared. This carried on when her baby was born, she almost had a backlog of anxiety from the journey of becoming and being pregnant that many others fortunately don’t have to experience and it never went away.
- Induction is often thought of as quick. It’s important for health professionals to educate parents that its actually very normal for induction to be as long as 4 or 5 days. It’s just your body preparing, it takes time. Many mothers feel like their body has failed them but that’s not the case at all.
- Laura’s birth experience was very traumatic for her and not what she wanted. It wasn’t anyone’s fault but it was very disappointing. She had preeclampsia and had to be induced but after a long induction period she had to have a C-section and then baby had to go to NICU. She found the entire birth experience difficult to come to terms with, but having a birth reflection session helped.
- After having her child Laura wanted to educate children especially, in how not everyone can just get married, have children and have a happy ever after. She wanted to help them in ways she wasn’t helped. If she had known about the different ways families are formed it wouldn’t have been as much of a shock to her to deal with infertility as an adult. So, she wrote the children’s book Robobabies.
- Robobabies is all about robots on a planet and how some robots need a bit of extra help to get a robobaby. Some need science, some need a kind person to help carry a robobaby or some need a family to help them to feel safe. It’s a gentle starter conversation to talk about fertility treatments, surrogacy and adoption to young children.
- People haven’t been able to have children since the start of time but we don’t talk about it as a society, this is why it is so often a shock to people who then struggle with infertility.
“The illustrations are gorgeous”
“I was so upset, my sister was pregnant, everyone around me was pregnant. I didn’t know anyone who had gone through fertility stuff, I was shocked and embarrassed.”
“I can’t get over people who just sleep together and then the next month they have a baby"
“I just couldn’t believe he was here”
“I wanted to show how special children are, and how special families are in whatever capacity”
“When is a good time to talk about a problem that affects 1 in 7 people…that might be your son, that might be your daughter and wouldn’t it be nice for them to know that isn’t abnormal”
“I was almost embarrassed to tell people because that wasn’t how it was supposed to go”
“Smile, love and be kind”
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ABOUT THE HOST
Devoted mother of two (and a big hairy dog), UK trained midwife, doula and personal trainer, specialising in pre and postnatal fitness.
Zoe was born in the UK and before moving to Dubai in 2013 and worked as a midwife in central London, both in a birth centre and a very busy NHS hospital.
Although late to the scene, Zoe is an aspiring athlete having won numerous triathlons and representing Great Britain where she placed within the top 10 on the world stage.
With her husband James, the couple will soon be launching their cloth nappy company, Bop & Bee, where they hope to inspire families to swap a few disposable nappies a day for the more planet friendly option of cloth.
Zoe’s goal is to share her knowledge and experience, tell real life stories, manage expectations and open up those often difficult conversations.
Zoe’s own motherhood journey has been full of twists and turns as she put everything on hold and went through numerous miscarriages and rounds of IVF.
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