As Teddy attempts to innumerate the various foibles attributed to American women, and we gain insight into Scotch's true feelings about the French, the show gets derailed and the guys start gossiping about life at their previous place of employment, CBS Radio.

Just as fast as this segment of your favorite Red Scare Radio Show begins, is just as fast as it ends as the guy intro and outro in less than 2

The prospect for the first redheaded Miss Norway, Sylvia Flote gets in depth on the finer points of being an international beauty and gives yet another insight as to why redheaded women are repelled by their male counterparts. Better luck next time, Teddy boy.

We can actually pin point how long ago the guys recorded this episode as Teddy and Scotch attempt to review a slew of various movies, no longer in theaters.

The Red Scare boys bring in Paulie from Paulie's Pizza in New York to discusses the intricacies of the creating the perfect pizza pie. Don't ask...

Teddy and Scotch discuss their mutual hatred for contemporary music and share how the music of their youth is still getting heavy rotation in their respective decks.

Here's a small taste of the best one-liners from the first several episodes of The Red Scare, with your boys Teddy James and Johnny Scotch. Enjoy!

Scotch and Teddy review the pros and cons of older, established men dating younger women, then ask you, the listening audience to chime in with your view points.

The guys review a blasphemous news story and Scotch recounts a time when he was tempted by G-d himself to perform an unholy act during church services.

The guys discuss the ramifications of getting into a mosh pit with the Red Scare and then delve into the issue of restaurant tipping. Does a piece of shit waiter, who's taken their fucking time all night long, still get an incentive to insure prompt service?

The guys discuss another encounter Teddy had with his old leper pig (O.L.P) of a neighbor, which confirms once again, that his reservation in eternal damnation is boldly confirmed

Since Teddy crapped all over the intro in the previous segment, Scotch takes the reigns and does absolutely nothing to improve on this previous foible. Thanks, Scotch.

In an attempt to be fresh, Teddy completely screws up the intro and derails the damn show. Thanks, Ted.

Because Teddy was a raging wino at the time, he was jonesing for a pour of his red life-blood on The Scare's visit to the X Games. Good times did not ensue...

Regardless of being the prime representation of what a man should be, Scotch has one huge insecurity... He's huge. The guys discuss what it entails to be a large individual as Scotch transcends to the high road and decides not to smack-a-hoe for attempting to hurt his portly feelings.

Teddy and Scotch bitch at each other over a slew of various topics from broadcast etiquette to which charity would be most appropriate for The Scare to contribute. You're welcome.

Johnny suggests a brilliant plan for Teddy to finally get revenge on his dirty, old leper pig of a neighbor. Which reveals that Teddy might actually have a part of his soul in which he hasn't yet committed to the devil.

People and their Effing Pets!

Although Teddy was flat broke and living on onions, he relays how an upside at work has turned his depression around, as Scotch discusses a bar encounter which veers to the guys delving into a hooker infested conversation.

Teddy James tells us about his love for chocolate.